Deciding to have another child

Well we haven't had our twins yet, but DH and I have wondered what we will do in the future. Right now we are just playing it by ear and getting ready to go through our first year with twins!!
But what if we want to have another child? First of all, I have a fertility problem (PCOS), so I'd most likely have to use meds again to get pregnant, which means a chance for multiples again. I can't imagine getting pregnant with twins (or more!) again, since I've been on bedrest for 3 months this time and was hospitalized for preterm labor. How do you women do it???????? I wouldn't have been able to follow all my Dr's orders if I had twin boys to take care of right now. I don't want the difficulty of pregnancy to be the reason we decide not to have more children. (of course there are other factors we will have to consider as well) I've otherwise had a very healthy pregnancy without complications.

 

I knew before the twins were born that I wanted more. This coming from someone who wanted NONE before getting married. :shok: Every time (yep, EVERY TIME) I would have a bad day my hubby would ask.. are you SURE you want more?! Yep. We did IVF to get the twins because after 7 years, we never got pregnant, even with drugs like clomid and no one could tell us why we were not getting pregnant. We were about a month away from a FET when we got pregnant on our own. After the first ultrasound I was visibly shaking when we went out to eat. It was twins AGAIN!!!! I did lose one in the next two weeks however so we did only get one out of the pregnancy. I just knew I wanted more and hubby was ok with it. Had I wanted another one after Evan, he would have been ok with it because in his eyes, I am the caregiver. Heck, driving home from the hospital I told him I would totally do that again (Vaginal birth with him.). But, we are done. We are older and 3 was enough, even though his angel sibling would have been more than welcome as well. Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy! I have heard SO many stories of 'surprise' pregnancies after having to use fertility drugs the first time!

 

We only ever wanted two kids, so it was a no-brainer for us to make that decision. But I would say to wait until after your twins have been born and around for awhile before you make any decisions.

For us, the first 10 months were exhausting because of reflux and milk and soy intolerance (which it took awhile to sort out and get under control). No way would I have even THOUGHT about having more kids during that time, even if I wanted more than two. I have friends with twins, however, and they were ready to try again when their twins were around 6 months old. (and they had to do IVF). Their twins were STTN at 6 weeks and were on great schedule, etc., so they felt okay with another pregnancy and more kids, even if it was twins or more.

And keep in mind that even a singleton pregnancy can mean bed rest. I spent a good part of the summer helping a friend who was on bed rest with her second pregnancy, just like she was with her first, and neither were twins. You just can't predict how things will go.

 

I wanted another baby after my twins and had frozen embryos left so I went for it! At the time I was afraid to have a second set but my RE insisted on transferring 2 so I did. I ended up with one sweet little guy but now I kinda wish Both had stuck. I just took it one day at a time with my pregnancy. Things work out!

 

I thought I wanted 2 kids and once mine were born knew I wanted a 3rd. My boys will be 2 1/2 when this baby is born. Ideally I'd have waited until they were 4 or 5, but this is how it happened.

I will say that 1 baby is worlds apart from carrying 2. If you could reduce your risk of having multiple multiples you may be surprised how much a non issue a 'normal' pregnancy is.

 

We didn't have fertility treatments, but I did have a lot of PTL and issues. The girls were 29.5 weekers and had 6 weeks of NICU time, so it really took us a while to decide that we would try for another baby (hence the 4 year space between them and the boys.) I do think it was good spacing for us that time as I ended up on bedrest at 20 weeks with the boys but the older kids were pretty functional (played independently, could get their own snacks, drinks, etc...) It wasn't easy (heck, no bedrest is ever easy) but it was as good as it possibly could have been. The boys we made it to 35 weeks, which was wonderful. This time around we didn't wait as long because we wanted them close in age again (like our DS and girls). It was twins again but we lost one early on and has been such an easy pregnancy compared to a twin pregnancy. That said, having twins again was much easier the 2nd time around and we would have loved to have another set.

I do think you'll know when the time is right - or maybe even a natural pregnancy (you do hear about that from time to time - I have a friend right now who had IVF twice and is now pregnant with her 3rd pregnancy completely natural surprise!) And you know what? The perfect spacing is the one that you get. It's so stressful deciding when to add to the family but always works out wonderfully (yes, even dealing with PTL and other issues) in the end. Even though the girls were born so early and are only 16 months younger than our oldest son I couldn't imagine it any other way.

 

We concieved twins 2x on our own WOWZA

 

I would wait until you have your babies and give it some time to all become more real. I had my boys and conceived two more sets after them (lost one set, lost Baby B of next)We were "done" after the boys were born and were on the pill with the last two sets. While each one of them would have been welcome, my head spins at the thought of our possible 8 babies. I couldn't even think about having another while pregnant.