Defiance after new baby

Discussion in 'The Toddler Years(1-3)' started by NicoleLea, May 9, 2013.

  1. NicoleLea

    NicoleLea Well-Known Member

    I am in desperate need ladies...I recently had my son and he is now 6 weeks old. Its been quite an adjustment for everyone. At first my girls were excited but after a couple weeks it seemed to turn to jealously which I'm sure is normal. They have begun acting up like crazy when previously they were good girls most of the time. My husband works out of town during the week so its just me and the 3 kids and it at times is overwhelming but I do the best I can. I admit that they need me to spend more time with them but many times I physically can't. Half the time they wait til I'm busy with the baby and start acting like hellions...jumping on the couch, sneaking candy, yelling. It really makes me mad especially because when I tell them to stop they scream "no!" "I'm not listening to you!" etc. and continue. It's like they know I can't do anything at that moment so they purposely take advantage. Now it's pretty much anything I ask, I hear "nope" and they just ignore me and walk off. I have been getting so mad I've started screaming which I know doesn't help but there is so much chaos I lose my temper. I usually start off nice but after the 10th time, I blow. I refuse to let a 5 year old walk all over me! I've tried it all..."playing" and making things fun, simply asking nicely, scolding, yelling, bribing, punishing, rewarding, no matter what I do they won't stop the behavior. I'm at my wits end. The baby isn't going away and I need some kind of order in my life again. Not to mention I was so happy at first and loved spending time with my girls. Now they just make me miserable to the point I don't even want to look at them :( I want my good girls back...
     
  2. cheezewhiz24

    cheezewhiz24 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    My boys were very defiant after their sister was born. I would say - don't ask 10 times. Ask and make them do it. If you can't follow through with the request (make them follow through due to the baby's needs) don't ask. Turn a blind eye if you can. Once you get them to realize you back up what you say then crack down on requests when you can't get up.

    I don't know if it'll work with your girls but it vastly helped to prep them when i knew the baby would need me- set them up with an activity and tell them I was going to feed the baby but I'd be back in 10 minutes or however long it would take.

    Finally, a baby can cry for a minute or two if you need to finish up something.
     
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