does your dh appreciate you bfing?

I'm just wondering. Am I the only one whose dh considers bfing no big deal and takes it for granted?
He just doesn't get it!

 

Tell him that it costs about $60 a week to feed twins formula. My DH does appreciate it, but I don't think they every fully grasp what it actually takes.

 

Liesel, you're right! maybe if I put it in financial terms he'll understand it because he definetly doesn't understand it in terms of waking up in the middle of the night and early morning or sore nipples etc.

 

My dh got it, but only because I beat him over the head with info before the babies came and said over and over how important it was to me....add the fact it gave him the excuse of not getting up with them ( ), he was supportive, lol!

 

mabye if you put your kids on formula and they barfed it up, got heartburn, cried, got sick or otherwise had a bad reaction to the formula, he'd appreciate you for it. since ours were born so small they had tons of digestive issues. they only had to take a few oz of formula/day and still had major problems w/it. that's when he appreciated my pumping more than anything. now, if one has to have some formula, dh get so sad.... he knows how good bm is for his kids and he knows the sacrifices i've made to provide it for them 90% of the time. thankfullly!

 

I am lucky my DH along with you ladies were my support. He totally understood why I wanted to do it and I think really really wanted me to also. He would have been happy either way but he really went the extra mile. Most men don't though. Don't hold it against them, they're men after all!

 

My DH is crazy about breastfeeding. . . he's more of a nazi about than I am! With our singletons, he wouldn't let me give them pacifiers because he was the one who was afraid they'd get nipple confusion! He is sold that it's best for the babies on many levels, and I don't think it hurts that it saves us money AND he isn't expected to wake in the night for breastfeedings, haha!

He's never given me a hard time about it, and he even encourages me to nurse in public.

 

QUOTE(Emily@Home @ Jul 10 2008, 08:07 PM) [snapback]870741[/snapback]
My DH is crazy about breastfeeding. . . he's more of a nazi about than I am! With our singletons, he wouldn't let me give them pacifiers because he was the one who was afraid they'd get nipple confusion! He is sold that it's best for the babies on many levels, and I don't think it hurts that it saves us money AND he isn't expected to wake in the night for breastfeedings, haha!

He's never given me a hard time about it, and he even encourages me to nurse in public.

:clapping: That is awesome!

 

Oooooh $60 / a week, DH doesnt know that, neither did i! I think he will appreciate it more once I tell him that.
There have been times where I have cried over bf'ing, and he says "lets just go to formula" like there are no repurcussions.
I say "i guess you dont want whats best for our babies" and I continue on. He is just thinking what is easier in some ways, than what is better.
Mostly he has been supportive.

 

This has been a little issue for us--nothing major, but I haven't felt 100 percent supported. He comes from a family of 6 and his mom's philosophyis feed, feed, feed. I think he felt if we gave them formula they would sleep through the night and would have done so early on --which I don't believe., because as we know it's more to do with habits than fullness--(they were full). I also think he thinks a little bit that nursing is more about my needs. I'll admit I love nursing them, but again we know it's the best for them. I don't think he's trying to be "mean" --I just don't think he truly understands the benefits for the babies, myself, our finances and his sleep!!! This forum has really been the best support for me to solidify my views on breastfeeeding. Thanks.

Lisa

 

Mine took over cooking for the family while I was nursing, and more than 3 years after weaning he is still doing the cooking.

 

After my 5 day hospital stay last week, DH came right out and told me that he loves that I BF. He had to be the one responsible for giving Avery almost every feeding (he brought him to the hospital to nurse once or twice a day) and getting up in the middle of the night with him. He's always supported my desire to BF, but that experience definitely made him "appreciate" it!

 

My dh hates it. I love it. My dh has no clue how much formula is. All he knows is I don't get much done around the house since I am bfing. Men!

 

Mine loves it ....he is very supportive....even over the Naysayers in my family that think the boys should be weaned by now! They are 6 months old! LOL He gets up in the night to change the babies and to bring them to me in bed. I love Breastfeeding! it is has been a wonderful experience for me. With my older boys (17 & 16 years old) I had no moral support from my family. Now on my second marriage, he and his family are all for it!

Thanks for this great topic !!


Oh and the money we save...well it doesn't hurt a bit! I heard on TV it cost around $2,000.00 per year per child OUCH!

 

DH is extremely supportive. He was the first to encourage me to try BFing instead of pumping. He even spent a couple of hours here on TS PMing my big sis Kristi - asking her questions, etc. while I was working with the boys when they were about 3 weeks old and I decided to "make the switch." He loves the nutritional benefits BFing gives the boys. He's totally OK with me BFing until a year...and I think he'd be cool with us doing it longer too. Though I do think he also misses "his boobs." :lol:

Becky

 

Mine could care less. It drives him nuts that I am "sitting and playing on the computer" while I pump. He doesn't get that I can't do it and keep after the babies at the same time. He has gotten better and he does understand the benefits of BFing but he's not totally supportive. He threw a massive fit about making room in the garage for a deep freeze. He didn't understand why I wasn't giving them all this frozen milk now. He didn't quite get that I have tons of fresh milk in the fridge at any given time that is given to them. I could kill him sometimes. <_<

 

I wouldn't say mine has been supportive or unsupportive. At this point I'm not sure either of us can remember a time when I wasn't nursing somebody. I do wish though that he would recognize how much more work it is to nurse 2 babies, and how rare it is to EBF twins.

 

Yes! :clapping: I could not manage it if he wasn't. Like a PP, he has taken over most of the cooking and he doesn't complain when I have to leave the other 3 kiddos with him while I nurse Lola. He agrees that it's best for babies and he knows how much it means to me. Plus, it's a huge financial savings for us!

 

My DH is incredibly supportive of my pumping. I think he's actually a little sad that I'm starting to wean from the pump. I was planning to be totally done by this week, but I just decided to keep the first morning pump and the pump right before bed. He seemed thrilled when I told him I was going to continue that for a while.

 

Mine was really supportive, but I don't think it had a lot to do with me, actually -- he just knows that BM is the best stuff for babies, and he wanted his babies to have the best, LOL.

It was really easy for him with our older DD -- nursing came easily for us, and with only one baby, he never once had to get up in the middle of the night to help. He thought it was just great.

This time around, we had all kinds of issues, but still -- he supported my pumping, and willingly took over caring for the kids and doing the housework so I could continue doing so....

 

My dh has been extremely supportive, and even pushed me to continue on through those first rough months, he got up and helped with every night feeding, he made meals while I sat and bf.
He knows the benefits of bm and would recite them to me when I got down or wanted to quit. he also came on-line and would read posts to me while I sat and bf.
He has been great and big reason why I continued to bf. I feel sad that others haven't had the same great experience that I have.

 

My dh has been very supportive. He also has taken over most of the cooking.

He did have a few comments when I extended bf ds, but he needed some time for adjustment (our original goal was 1 year) and education on the matter!

 

My DH has been incredibly supportive these past 5.5 months. However, he has been concerned by the poor weight gain of both babies and has encouraged me to follow the ped's advice to supplement with a bottle each day.

He gets up with me for every feeding, still 2x-3x a night :wacko: , and has never complained about it. I could do it alone, but he always puts out his arm to burp a baby or put one to bed if the other is still feeding.

He probably is looking forward to getting that "part" of me back though!

 

Well, my DH must be different than all of yours. I do not feel that he is supportive 100% of the time. He acts as though he is, but there are all these underlying comments, especially since they are 6 months old now, like when are you going to wean them, how much longer are you going to breastfeed them, etc. In fact about a week ago when he asked how long are you going to breatfeed them, I replied with 6 months, as in 6 more months, and he took it as 6 months, like 6 months total, and got all excited and said, oh good, that means you are almost done, and I looked at him all confused. Big misunderstanding! Next time he mentions something I'm bringing up the cost of formula. The other funny thing is when we pick the girls up from daycare, (they get 1 bottle of formula there) he mentions how they stink. Yes, they smell like formula, yuck. I always have to change their clothes, and occasionally bathe them when we get home to get rid of the formula smell. So, he doesn't like how formula makes them smell, but is ready for them to move to formula 100%. Stupid Men.

 

DH is very supportive. When I switched to pumping he liked that he's able to help with feedings. I breastfed DD all the time so he didn't get to help feed her till she started solids at 6 months. With the boys I know he like that we're saving money!

 

My DH is pretty supportive. He has his moments. He is the one that has encouraged me from the beginning though. I think he as other PP has mentioned, feels I am not doing things because I am sitting in front of the computer while pumping (as if I would be able to do a whole lot more). When it is all said and done, though, I think he does appreciate what I am doing and as for money... he likes that fact that we don't have to buy formula... even on WIC you don't get as much as you would need! $$$$ saved is always appreciated at our house!

 

Ok, I'd like to now take back my last post on this thread! Last night when we all got home after work, DH was holding DD1, and she spit up formula from the babysitters all over him. He said, "This formula is so disgusting, it smells horrible, I'm glad you breastfeed so much and that is what they get 90% of the time.". I just replied, "Wow, listen to you jumping on the breastfeeding bandwagon!". If only he knew how sexy I found him after he said that.

 

I am lucky to have a very supportive husband. He's more of a BF nazi than I am, lol! He loves watching them nurse and seeing how happy and relaxed they are afterward, and he gives my milk all the credit (probably more credit than it deserves!) for them having only gotten one tiny cold in their lives, nothing else ever.

 

My dh came from a house of 4 bf babies out of the 4 siblings. So to him it was just something that he was used to and he knows how good it is for the baby and loves that I bf. We talked about this before having kids and he knew before even how serious I was to nurse our babes. So to him he is very happy with it and thats that.

 

I read somewhere that the dad's attitude is the single biggest predictor of how successful bf'ing will be. (Don't know where that puts single moms...)
My DH was not only supportive, he was helpful and encouraging. He used the syringe to teach Ella how to latch, he brought me water and food, fought off the comments from his family. When I went back to work at 14 weeks, he put himself in charge of cleaning and maintaining the pump & taking care of the EBM I brought home. But even with that, I don't think he got how hard it all was.

I don't think it would hurt to look for times to tell him how much his support has helped you. Tell him about "some online friend" whose DH never did X or Y that yours did, and "Did I ever tell you how much that meant to me?"