Feeling Anxious about the future :(

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Help' started by Twicethelove, Jun 11, 2016.

  1. Twicethelove

    Twicethelove New Member

    Hello Im new here , My name is Theresa and I am 13 weeks pregnant with fraternal Twins .
    I was shocked to learn I was pregnant from the beginning let alone to be expecting twins. as the news starts to sink in I have this overwhelming feeling of panic and feeling very anxious , I have one son before this he is 20 now so the last time I was pregnant was many years ago .

    I am scared how I will cope , will i be a good mum how will i cope with two babies , I am thinking I am not alone feeling or thinking this , its just a huge feeling of panic now the news is starting to sink in.

    I was looking through the web and found this site , I think it maybe good for me to talk to other parents and see how they coped and handled things and a little advice .

    When I found out I was pregnant my partner was far from happy as our pregnancy was not planned and all he kept going on about was WE was not ready and that he wanted me to abort our pregnancy which I flat out refused coming to the conclusion I will do this on my own if I have to .

    Now he has come around to the idea and working every hour he can to make sure our future is secure which I totally understand and respect , what I do not get is that i feel like hes keeping everything a secret and quiet from the one person that I find it very important to tell , His Mother !

    I have a lot of respect for her on a whole and think she would look on this a lot worse the longer he does not tell her , baring in mind my partner is almost 37 i find this very strange and unacceptable . My family know all my friends know and although I am petrified I am finding myself becoming quiet excited at the thought I am going to be a Mother again soon .

    I want to feel secure and know that myself and these babies are going to be happy if i stay with Him rather than do this alone , As it stands I would rather do it alone if he is not able to be proud of the family that is soon to be if that makes sense .

    Sorry if i seem to be rampling I just feel so dam confused and my hormones are all over the place some advice will ease my mind from others who have been through this or something similiar .

    Thank you for reading my post and I look forward to hearing from you all soon .

    Theresa <3
     
  2. kingeomer

    kingeomer Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Welcome to TS Theresa! Congratulations on your pregnancy!

    I was terrified when I found out I was having twins (my twins are now 8). I was a first time mother and feeling like I don't even know how to care for one baby let alone two babies! I was worried about that, worried about how we would afford it, worried about the pregnancy itself, the children's health, and what kind of Mom would I be, etc.. You name it, I worried about it. The worrying is normal. You don't know what to expect. Some of the things that I helped was that my husband and I realized that we were and needed to be on the same time regarding parenting...this involved a lot of talking and negotiating. His style is different then mine. It's not better nor is it worse and I find that we always balanced each other out. If people offer to help, take them up on it and hold them to it. I would suggest the first night home with the babies, have someone else there to help you and you partner out.

    Have you and your partner talked about why he has not told his mother yet? I am wondering if he is afraid to tell her due to his own worries? I'm not sure, but I would talk to him about it. I don't know what his relationship is like with his mother and why he would not tell her yet.
     
  3. Isla20

    Isla20 New Member

    I have a scary situation ive already got 4 2 been twins just found out im expecting again .
     
  4. lharrison1

    lharrison1 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Isla-you have 4 children and you are expecting your 5th? I take it this was unplanned? How old are your twins?

    Theresa-What Nancy said is true-I was scared and actually cried when I found out I was pregnant with twins-it's scary to think about. Mine are also 8 now and we survived. Nancy gave some great advice. I do think it's time for an honest conversation with your partner about communicating with your families about what's going on. *hugs*
     
  5. Isla20

    Isla20 New Member

    Totally unplanned my twin boys are 10 month old.
     
  6. lharrison1

    lharrison1 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Isla-you will be busy, but I feel you CAN do it! Do you have a good support group of friends or family to help out? 2 year old twins and an infant will be a lot of work.
     
  7. Isla20

    Isla20 New Member

    My twins are 10 month old now they will be 16 month when baby is born if i go full term.
     
  8. lharrison1

    lharrison1 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    You'll find strength you didn't even know you had once it comes down to it. I promise.
     
  9. Isla20

    Isla20 New Member

    Im so scared x
     
  10. lharrison1

    lharrison1 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    That's normal, it really is normal to feel that way. *hugs* But look at this way-you will be a pro by the time your next baby comes. Do you have any family support? Do you work or are you a stay at home mom?
     
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