Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child

Discussion in 'The First Year' started by momof6, Jan 5, 2011.

  1. momof6

    momof6 Well-Known Member

    I had heard about this book and decided to get it. I have a few questions if someone could help me out.

    1. Our twins were born at 35 and 3. According to this book it appears that you count your child's age from the due date, so our twins are really 2 weeks old for purposes of this book?

    2. If I am understanding, you soothe your baby however you can and don't let them cry in the first 6 weeks (6 weeks from original due date) and not worry about sleep training until 6 weeks?

    3. The only sleep training you can start right away is keeping the wake time to an hour or 2 or less if you see tired signs?

    4. Did any one use the sleep training before 6 weeks combined age?

    5. Is Extinction better or graduated extinction? Even now we use a bit of graduated extinction and they are out in 10-15 min.

    We are so very tired and just don't know what to do. We are hoping this book will help but I am confused. Hoping one of you with a bit more sleep and experience can help. We have 5 other kids at home one we home school and one is 3 so we need to have some sleep or they suffer to.

    Thanks
     
  2. murtygirl

    murtygirl Well-Known Member

    Yes, I have read the book and think it is a great concept. I was SO extremely exhausted and was desperate for sleep to the point of mild hallucinations (I thought I put a baby on my nightstand!LOL!) body aches, shakiness, and, needless to say, tears.. I had the nights all on my own (dh works nights).

    My twins are now one week shy of 5 months old, but are 3 months adjusted (they were born at 31 weeks, and came home from NICU at 34 and 35 weeks). They have been sleeping 11-12 hours at night without a peep for a couple months. The first month and a half I put them anywhere and everywhere they would sleep. Then I broke down and let the sleep on their tummies. They immediately slept 7 hours solid that night. It was heaven. We have not looked back

    Yours are still soo very young and it WILL get better. Make sure you are feeding every 2-3 hours during the day. Don't let them "sleep in". Bring them into the sunny/noisy living room first thing in the morning. Mine are just now being able to stay up for 90 minutes to 2 hours. Perhaps you could try putting them down for naps at the 60 minute mark??

    I let mine fuss themselves to sleep and have for a couple months. Unless they are hysterical, of course. Then I will pat their butts and shhhhhh them. Many may not agree with this approach because I started this at such a young age, but it works for us, and we all get plenty of sleep.

    I have found that they are more like their ACTUAL age when it came to their sleep behaviors as opposed to their adjusted age. And mine were even more premature than yours. But in the end, you know what is best for your babies. THe biggest help for us was the tummy sleeping. I sure hope you get relief soon. We have all been there and I know it is miserable :youcandoit: :grouphug:
     
  3. momof6

    momof6 Well-Known Member

    My DS was on his tummy today and he rolled over. I think he would sleep well that way but I am a chicken and to scared to let them tummy sleep. I would probably be up all night checking them. But at this point I think I will do anything for sleep. I am nursing with a few relief EBM bottles. We have given DS Alimentum because of his severe gas and spitting up but we are not sure if it is helping so I am still nursing. If I feed them every 2-4 hours during the day wont that not allow them to learn to eat when they are hungry? I don't think they even stay up an hour at a time most days. I do bring them up into the living room but not usually until 8 or 9 when they wake up the last time. If they wake at 6am I feed them and put them back down, but mostly for my benefit because I am still so tired and if my 3 yr old hears us up then she will and I will be in for a LOOOOOOONG day! Thanks for all the advice... I am looking forward to some more sleep soon!
     
  4. murtygirl

    murtygirl Well-Known Member

    oohhhh, sounds like you have some other issues going on with the reflux...I hope you can get that worked out for the little fella!

    Well, I suppose feeding them every 2.5 to 3 hours could potentially teach them to eat when they are not hungry, but I think that most babies do eat that frequently willingly. My thinking on it is fill them up during the day so that they don't need it at night. Once they started taking bigger bottles during the day they slept longer at night. But I am sure breast feeding is a whole different ballgame.

    Yeah, tummy sleeping is not for everyone. I was so scared at first, too. But oh, so desperate for sleep. And if yours are rolling over, it's even more safe.

    HSHHC is a great book, and I refer to it often!
     
  5. leaudemiel

    leaudemiel Well-Known Member

    I read it over and over again and was too tired to understand what they wanted me to do. I couldnt figure out what age to work with (38 weeks for twins?) and it just made me flustered. At 6 weeks we were in survival mode just trying to get through! We started sleep training at 6 montbs, doing ferber, and it worked (for nighttime, not naps yet).

    Good luck!
     
  6. fmcquinn

    fmcquinn Well-Known Member

    It was my bible the first five months. I stuck fervently to the idea of keeping them awake for 90 minutes or so. At tge time, I didn't feel like it was working, but at around four months, they seemed to fall into sone sort of sleep pattern.

    We tried graduated extinction at five months with no luck, then we did modified extinction at six months and it worked. We put the girls down drowsy. If they cried, we'd check after 10 minutes, soothe, and then not go back for an hour. It took a good two months before we didn't have to go in for paci checks, but even that was only a couple times a night.
     
  7. momof6

    momof6 Well-Known Member

    Is Ferber the CIO method?
     
  8. Rollergiraffe

    Rollergiraffe Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    I think all you can take from HSHHC right now is to promote good sleep routines. Shushing, sucking, swaddling etc. Keeping the lights low etc. But they are far too young to really truly CIO. You might have to let them fuss for a few minutes at times while you attend to the other twin or your other kids, but CIO is about teaching them to self soothe, and they just don't have the ability to learn that right now. I know you must have a busy household.. is everyone chipping in with laundry, getting their lunches together etc? I'd try and get everyone chipping in a bit more, and with the babies too, so you can focus a bit more on the sleep.

    What were your previous kids' sleep patterns like? I know every kid is really different, but I think sometimes it helps to remember that magic moment where they slept through the first time ;)
     
  9. MarchI

    MarchI Well-Known Member

    This. Right now, you should just be reading the book and getting tips on keeping them comfortable. I think until they are 3 months adjusted, anything goes, it is your job right now just to learn how you like to put them to sleep and how long they will sleep at a time. The 1.5-2 hour thing is just an average. At 1 month, mine stayed up for an hour and then were ready to go back to sleep so we let them. It wasn't until 4 months or so that they became less sleeping beings and more interested in the world. Oh and even though mine were born at term, I followed the due date rule so I didn't do any sleep training until they are 3 months 2 weeks old. And what I did at that time was try to make sure they got a nap at the same times each day.
     
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