How heavy is too heavy?

Discussion in 'The Toddler Years(1-3)' started by Trishandthegirls, Feb 2, 2012.

  1. Trishandthegirls

    Trishandthegirls Well-Known Member

    Piper and Cricket are about 35 pounds, and I've realized that it hurts my back to pick them up. They love "pick up hugs" and being carried around the house just for fun, but lately I've been making a lot of excuses not to pick them up. They're almost 5, so it's not like they really need to be carried. But I wonder at what age parents stop picking their kids up for hugs? We probably pick them up half the time and bend down the other half.

    What about the rest of you? Do you still pick your kids up for hugs? Do you carry them? If not, at what approximate weight did you stop?

  2. jjzollman

    jjzollman Well-Known Member

    My boys are 4 and 36-37 lbs and I still pick them up way too often. I have stopped carrying them up the steps. They love being picked up and carried, too. It was easy to stop with my oldest, I was pregnant with them and stopped when I was around 12ish week pregnant and I had a good excuse.

    Definitely won't be having that excuse this time around, so I have o come up with something else! :lol:
  3. Tamaralynn

    Tamaralynn Well-Known Member

    My oldest is 4 and 40lbs and I still pick him up for hugs, even though it kills my back. I do encourage snuggles on the couch more though.
  4. Fran27

    Fran27 Well-Known Member

    We stopped carrying them sometime this year... shortly after 3, I think. I think they were maybe 25-27lb then. We only pick them up to put them on the couch to change their diaper, when they don't want to do it themselves (yes, still in diapers, I know.. sigh).
  5. becasquared

    becasquared Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    I still pick up A&R and they're pushing 40 pounds by now. But I don't pick them up together anymore! I had to stop that last year. It was a little rough picking up over 50 pounds of kid.
  6. mama_dragon

    mama_dragon Well-Known Member

    I still pick up and carry both of my boys at the same time. They are 31 and 32 lbs so 63lbs combined. Both tall. I weigh 115 lbs and I have arthritis in my spine. I can't go very far with both of them but I can still manage the stairs in a pinch. One at a time is not a problem at all and I can't imagine it will be anytime soon. Luckily I have one that wants up more than the other. They will be way to big to carry before I know it so I don't mind. I will continue to pick them up until they don't want to be picked up anymore.

    I am careful about how I pick them up. I kneel and stand straight up using my legs not my back. It is a fantastic leg workout.
    1 person likes this.
  7. Dielle

    Dielle Well-Known Member

    Spencer and Sabrina (2 1/2 and 6yo) are both about 32-35 lbs. I pick Spencer up way more often. He's a toddler, somehow it makes more sense... even though he's actually heavier than his big sister. He's more likely to fall asleep on me, or be difficult and need to be put in bed or time out or something. Sabrina is actually easier to pick up in some ways, because she's a little taller and very able to help be picked up, if that makes sense. But I don't pick her up often. I think I just don't think of it very much. I haven't picked up Sydney in ages. I can't remember the last time. But she's over 50 lbs. I do pull all of my kids onto my lap now and again. Even Sage who's 13 and probably pretty close to full-grown. I think that's a mom's prerogative and they all seem to love it (though the oldest couple are just a tad embarrassed) when I do. I wouldn't do that in front of their friends or anything though, of course.
  8. E's 3

    E's 3 Well-Known Member

    I really only pick up my 4 year old if he's sick. Sometimes at bedtime he will ask to be carried upstairs but he usually gets a piggy back from either DH or I and the other carries the girls. He's only 34lbs but I stopped picking him up and carrying him around a lot when I was pregnant with the girls. He will ask for cuddles and hugs on the couch so I do it seated. The girls are both 29lbs and I still carry them both around at the same time way more than I should...I'm only 115lbs so that's a lot to be carrying!
  9. kingeomer

    kingeomer Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    My two are 4 and weigh 30 and 31 lbs and I still do pick up and hugs with them when they want them. Usually when they want to be carried is when they don't feel well or are tired, so it's not often.
    But, they are definitely too heavy for me to carry them together. My DH can still do that though.
  10. Leighann

    Leighann Well-Known Member

    I rarely pick up my girls now. Not because they are too heavy to lift, but because they are such big independent girls now. Not to mention they are getting pretty tall especially Ana.. so it looks pretty funny for me at 5'1" (barely) to be holding my almost 5 year old who is nearly 44" tall!
  11. lharrison1

    lharrison1 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    My 7yo is only 43lbs and I still scoop her up for a quick hug and on occassion will carry her to bed...I did tell her just the other day 'pretty soon you are going to be too big for me to carry' and she just squeezed me tighter as if to say she 'knew'. The other two are only 28 and 29lbs at 4, and they get carried if they want for short distances...they're like little monkeys. :D
  12. Rollergiraffe

    Rollergiraffe Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Mine are 35 lbs apiece, but they're only 2.5 so there's still a lot of carrying going on. It's not too bad, I strong like bull now.
    3 people like this.
  13. FGMH

    FGMH Well-Known Member

    Mine are only 2.5 years old and weigh about 27 pounds each. I hardly ever carry them any more, except properly in a sling or baby carrier if we are going on longer walks or one is really sick. If necessary I can carry them both but try to avoid it. I started having back trouble too much. So we really worked with them to get them walking when we are out and about as we hardly ever use the stroller any more.
    I do pick them up for hugs etc. a lot but am working on getting down on my knees or sitting on the floor and cuddling them there instead. I get funny stares a lot because you will find me kneeling in the street in my business clothes comforting a child on my lap rather than picking them up.
  14. NicoleLea

    NicoleLea Well-Known Member

    My kids are almost 4 and they still want to be carried a lot. Mainly it is when we go out places which makes it more of a pain, like they want to be carried when we are trying to do grocery shopping. We generally put them in the cart in that situation. It can be tough because if it is just me with them I obviously am not going to carry both. Haha. At home I pick them up every once in awhile but not too much. I feel like they are old enough not to be carried anymore.
  15. sulik110202

    sulik110202 Well-Known Member

    My kids will be 5 in a few weeks and probably weight about 42 lbs each. We still pick them up for hugs and carry them to bed, but not as much anymore. The weight isn't so much the issue, but that they are tall, so they can be kind of awkward to carry if you don't hold them the right way.
  16. mommylaura

    mommylaura Well-Known Member

    My six year old is 45 pounds and definitely does not want to be carried around any more. I do carry him upstairs when he is exremely tired (e.g. after watching a movie at night), or to time out when he is being a wretch. And I scoop him up for a hug every once in a while. But all of this is very rare. For the most part he does not want me to carry him - sniff sniff.
  17. Minette

    Minette Well-Known Member


    My DDs are six and around 40 lbs. I carry them every once in a while -- for instance, last night I carried them both (one at a time) from the car to the house after skiing when they were super-tired. But that was a special treat.

    It doesn't bother my back that much, normally, to carry them for a few seconds. But for the past couple of years, I've been very open with them about the fact that sometimes Mommy's back hurts, and I just can't pick them up. They went through a serious phase around age 5 of wanting to climb on me and be held/carried, and I had to put limits on it or I would have been crippled. :rolleyes: So sometimes they still ask, but at least they're used to hearing "no."

    I also have rules about how they have to hold on (tightly!) and hold still. If I'm holding someone and she leans away from me or starts squirming, she goes down on the floor immediately, and sometimes not gently.

    ETA: Amy is really good at jumping up into my arms. I can't bend down to pick up a child who isn't doing at least half the work (except in severe cases of "you have to go to your room right now," which I pay for afterwards), but when she jumps up, all I have to do is bend my knees.
  18. ddancerd1

    ddancerd1 Well-Known Member

    :cry: this made me so sad! :cry:
  19. ddancerd1

    ddancerd1 Well-Known Member

    my girls are 4 and 44lb each of solid... something. i still carry them around now and then. i'll miss it one day, so i enjoy it now. i refuse to carry them if they are too lazy to walk/stand/etc, tho.
    i still try to carry them at the same time, cuz i tend to think i'm Miss Muscle & Fitness and can easily carry 88lb of limbs (very tall girls). my arms have gotten pretty frickin' strong, tho, i gotta say lol
  20. Christel

    Christel Well-Known Member

    I pick up my girls occasionally (60ish lbs) but they don't want me too often, so it doesn't come up. I carry Matt and Ev and carseat to and from the car and sitter every day; that's about 60 lbs too.
  21. AmynTony

    AmynTony Well-Known Member

    at nearly 6 and 41 and 44 lbs I don't do much carrying around (although DH will still carry Abby to bed if she falls asleep on the couch at night) but I will sit on the couch and pick them up into my lap for snuggles - and they still enjoy laying ON me when I'm watching TV - and when they do it together I feel like I'm suffocating...if I had to carry Abby I could for a short distance but Ian is 44 lbs of muscle - it would be like trying to carry a side of beef!
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