I am at my end with this CRAP!

Discussion in 'The Toddler Years(1-3)' started by ldrane, Mar 12, 2011.

  1. ldrane

    ldrane Well-Known Member

    DS has been potty trained for months now. However, he has started pooping in his pants again. If that's not bad enough, he also tries to clean himself up and hide the fact that he has done it. :gah: I don't know how many times I have had to wash the rug and shower curtain in there bathroom this week! I have to go searching for the poopy underwear. It is disgusting :bad: and it is driving me batty!!!! :grr: I don't know what to do. I have threatened to put him back in diapers....which he gets really upset about. BUT...I am freakin' tired of all the crap everywhere!!!! He is approaching 4 years old. This is ridiculous!!! Anyone else dealt with this??? What did you do??? Are we missing something?? He knows when he needs to go because he runs off for some privacy. He had been pooping on the potty. However, we have had on and off issues with this since being potty trained. I am at my end with this! HELP!! He could careless about sticker charts or reward for good behavior. The few times lately we have gotten him to go on the potty was by pure bribery with chocolate. Tell me he will quit this habit before he starts kindergarten!!!! He is just so stubborn! UGGGGGHHHHHHH!
     
  2. DATJMom

    DATJMom Well-Known Member

    Hang in there and dont let him see you sweat. Way easier said than done. I have screamed, cried, spanked, etc. It is awful and I totally understand your feelings. But I have come to terms with it and we just go with it.

    Tyler is still not potty trained for poop and he is just over 4. I have done everything I can think of. Stickers charts, candy, praise, etc. They work for a bit and then they dont anymore. I did take him to the Ped to rule out any medical issues and she thought he might be constipated. So we did an enema clean out and then started him on Miralax daily. That really helped. We now have more poop in the potty than in the pants, but he is still not perfect with it.

    PM me if you need an ear. I am here and living it. :hug:
     
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  3. akameme

    akameme Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    major sympathy....we have a problem with Jake pooping and not telling us...the other night we found a bath towel with poop, we had throw out toilet paper..it was epicly gross... I wish i had advice, the only thing i will say is that jake doesn't seem to totally understand when he poops. it's weird because he doesn't have accidents but yet when he poops we will ask him and he will have to look into the toilet to see...strange. good luck!
     
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  4. ldrane

    ldrane Well-Known Member

    That is exactly the way it goes around here too. The praise/candy/rewards work for a bit and then they don't. DH and I talked about a possible constipation issue and maybe needing Miralax. We had to do that with DD. However, his poops don't really seem to be constipated...some maybe, but not all the time. :unknw: Maybe I should bring it up to the ped. just in case...to rule it out.

    :thanks:
     
  5. MNTwinSquared

    MNTwinSquared Well-Known Member

    First off :hug: x one million! Potty training has to be up there in stress levels! Kids are at so many different levels. My niece was potty trained at two, but then when little sister was born it was back into diapers! Getting mad and frustrated is par for the course. Is there something else going on in the child's life that may be distracting? Obviously he knows it is not good to poop in pants, but something must be preventing him from getting tok the toilet. I know a lot of kids get scared about the flush and worried about going down with it. The quickest way to get my youngest out of the tub is to let the water out. Perhaps he is too busy having fun and then it is too late. ((hugs)). I hope this is just a hiccup!
     
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  6. twoplustwo

    twoplustwo Well-Known Member

    :hug: :hug: Ugh! so gross :bad: I have had to deal with something similar with ds. Sticker charts were a joke with him, he could care less. Sorry you are having to deal witht hat. I think Potty training is the worst!

    For me it depends on if he is being manipulative or just having accidents and is feeling embarrassed and trying to handle it himself. If you believe it is an accident I would try to have more patience and work on letting him know that accidents happen (to minimize embarrassment) but he must tell you so you can help him. I think it is fair to tell him that if he can't yell for you and tell you he needs help, you will start staying in the bathroom every time he has to go so you can check if he's pooped and needs help. It will be a bit of a pain but a whole lot less messy in the end (no pun intended...well maybe a little).

    If it is manipulative I would give one warning about diapers and then if he does it again, put him back in diapers for a day. My ds was doing it whenever he was angry about something and it was totally manipulative. I did put him back in a "baby diaper" for a day and he HATED it and he stopped putting 2 pounds of poopy paper all over the floor and clogging the toilet etc.

    Either way just keep telling him that hiding the evidence is not okay (which I am sure you are already doing).

    I would also remove the carpet in the bathroom he uses and take the towels off the towel rack and keep them out of his reach for a bit.
     
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  7. ldrane

    ldrane Well-Known Member

    Not really. We did start a new business in December. So, I am not a full-time SAHM anymore. However, they stay with my mom who they adore. The only other thing 'different' per se was DD's recent accident and surgery. BUT...he has been doing this on & off for 6+ months now. :unknw:
    This is what he tells me when I ask him why he doesn't go poop on the potty. He will pee. So, it seems odd to me. Plus we have a 'froggy potty' sitting in the bathroom as well that doesn't flush, but he still won't use that most days.


    I don't think it is accident's. He just flat out refuses to go sit on the toilet. When we catch him hiding to poop, he throws a fit if we try to get him to go on the toilet.

    I personally think he is just stubborn! ;) BUT...then I start second guessing it and wonder if we are missing something...like something medical (constipation).
     
  8. Donita

    Donita Well-Known Member

    I went through it with one of my boys (I won't name him in case he reads this). He was just too darn busy to stop and go to the bathroom. I told him he was no longer a baby and I wasn't cleaning it up anymore. I would give him wet paper towels and send him to the bathroom. I'd make him shower himself and wash out his pants. Good luck! I think it's just a busy boy thing.
     
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  9. ldrane

    ldrane Well-Known Member

    Thanks Donita! I think you might be right. <_<
     
  10. Lynn76

    Lynn76 Well-Known Member

    Oh, potty training boys is so hard. I think not sitting on the potty is just another thing in their life they can control. This along with eating. You know, one day they are gung ho about something so you make it again only for them to stick their noses up at it.

    I made the mistake of trying to potty train my oldest just over 3yrs old. I wanted it done before the twins got here. HUGE mistake. It was not pretty. He just simply wasn't ready yet. Finally when he was a month shy of 4, I sat down with him and the video Potty Power, had him sit naked on his potty chair while he watched. He happened to go potty while he was sitting there and that was it for peeing. Pooping was a whole 'nother issue. I was in the same boat as you. I was tired of cleaning up poopy underware. I think I even threw some out b/c I was so grossed out and just tired. I happen to be watching Dr Phil one afternoon and there were some parents dealing with the same thing. Dr Phil said to find his "currency". Something that is so very special or something that is a huge deal for him. Couple of days later, ds happen to be on the potty peeing and he just happened to poop too. A light bulb went on in my head and I thought, computer!! My ds loved to play his educational games on the computer. I told him since he went poopy on the potty, he could play on the computer. That was it. Every time he went on the potty, he came to me asking if he could play on the computer.

    I am taking a different approach with the twins. I am not going to stress over it at all. I know they won't be 6 or 7 and not potty trained. I think I will introduce the potty chair around 3 1/2 but if they choose not to use it, thats fine.
     
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