I'm 3/4 done with when your expecting twins, triplets, or quads by Dr. Luke

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Help' started by kitkat72783, Jan 13, 2009.

  1. kitkat72783

    kitkat72783 Well-Known Member

    So I found out I was pregnant with twins at about 6 weeks and I was completely and totally in shock with thousands of questions. I heard rave reviews about the book "when your expecting twins, triplets, or quads" by Dr. Luke so I rushed down to Barnes and Nobles to get it. Granted for the first trimester I was at work from 7:30-4:00 and then in bed by 5 and nauseas all the time so I got little reading in but now that I'm getting through the book, I loved the first few chapters regarding what to eat and how much to gain, its the only book I've seen focused on twins and how weight gain is good. this made me feel a lot better about me 10 pound weight gain in my first trimester. Now for the parts I dont quit get, granted I'm only 15 weeks along right now so things may seem different in ten weeks but in this book it states that through out a twin pregnancy the mom should take hour naps in the morning afternoon and evening....Um hello this is the real world and while my three year old is great leaving him unsupervised for three hours a day isnt that smart of an idea. Then Dr. Spark says if you work full time you need to find a spot to laydown for at least 30 minutes two times a day....My boss is so not going to go for that <_<
    Also she states that with twins you shouldnt be working more than thirty hours a week or 6 hours a day when your pregnant with twins.....My boss hates pregnant people as it is so cutting back my hours would be a huge battle..but my OB hasnt mentioned it...Is it really true. Also Dr. Luke says no vacuuming, mopping, tub cleaning and so on....Now this I wont argue with....but is it true....Should I be adding this onto my poor hubby's growing list of things he must take over. Then the last part I read last night was about how most OB's will suggest taking work leave at 28 weeks with twins...Is this true? My Ob hasn't said anything about this...I do have an easy desk job I really only have to stand up to go to lunch or the bathroom.

    I liked the book, I mean its answered alot of questions thus far, its just now I seriously feel like I need to live in some bubble for the next five months....I'm scared to make any plans with friends or plan on working till I pop.
     
  2. hrm17

    hrm17 Well-Known Member

    Yep I loved the nutritional info in Luke's book, but I totally agree with you that the napping/resting stuff is unrealistic for a working mother or someone who is the primary caregiver for other children.

    I'm still working 40-50 hour weeks at 27 weeks. What I do is make sure I spend most of the time sitting, and I have a nice footrest at my desk so that I can keep my legs horizontal. I drink lots of water, and I take it easy on the way to and from work. When I have to walk somewhere I walk REALLY slowly (no small feat in NYC!).

    My OB did suggest early on that I may want to broach the subject with my boss of leaving work at 28 weeks, depending how I felt. She said that it gets hard to walk around and found that most of her twin mothers (she is a multiples specialist) felt "too tired to work" beyond that point. I am a few days away from 28 weeks and I'm not feeling it yet, so I guess everyone is different.
     
  3. lucky123

    lucky123 Well-Known Member

    I know a lot of people like her but I think she's full of it.

    FWIW, I tried my best to eat more (but didn't stuff myself or take in 3500 calories) and eat lots of protein and get ample rest. I worked FT at a desk job until to 1 day before my c/s at 38.5 wks (for previa), gained 40 lbs, and had a 7 lber and a 6 lber. 6 mo later I'm 10 lbs under my pre-PG weight (yay for bf'ing).

    My OB said do what you feel you reasonably can. If you feel ok working, do it. If not, or if you develop some reason to stop (like PT labor) we'll deal with work.

    My attitude was I know there are lots of complications but until I have some, I going to act healthy and go about my life as best I could.

    I also think any kind of one size fits all PG twin women advice is automatically suspect.
     
  4. nicinthebu

    nicinthebu Well-Known Member

    My OB twin specialist and peri did not put any restrictions on me and I worked up until29 weeks and often worked significant OT. I went out b/c like pp I was having hard time walking and stress from work became too much (plus my DH is gone so I have to do everything at home from taking care of our dogs to dragging in the groceries, ect). I know lots of twin mommies and all have different stories. I can only say to listen to you body and try to put you and the babies first. It sound like your boss is unkind so you want to make it the best poss situation but you need to worry about you and the babies more. I relate b/c I was afraid to go out early but in the end my boss surprized me w/ her support (either way it was best for the babies as I do not want to deliever any earlier than neceessary!

    I will send happy thoughts and anti-work stress beams your way!! lol. I hope your Pg goes extra smoothly!!
     
  5. Minette

    Minette Well-Known Member

    I had the same reaction to Dr. Luke. Most of what I found helpful in that book were the dietary recommendations, especially the emphasis on protein, calcium, and healthy fats (rather than the generic "eat healthy" recommendation that the OB gave me). I also appreciated the reassurance that gaining weight wasn't a bad thing, since I was soooo hungry and was gaining more than my OB recommended.

    But I did find her pretty alarmist. I finally decided that she sees her primary job as preventing premature birth of multiples -- or, if premature birth cannot be avoided, making sure the babies weigh as much as possible when they arrive. But most of the bad/scary things she discusses will not happen to any given person, so it's not worth freaking out about them.

    She just wants you to be prepared for all possibilities, know the warning signs if you see them, and be prepared to advocate for yourself and your babies (with your OB, your spouse, your boss, your parents, whoever), because most people don't understand that a twin pregnancy is not like a singleton pregnancy with just a little more weight gain.

    Most of those recommendations (for resting, not doing chores, etc.) will make a lot more sense further along. I basically lived like a normal pregnant person (except for the near-constant eating) until I was about 22 weeks, but after that, my discomfort increased dramatically and I felt like I couldn't do nearly as much as I used to. At that point, it was helpful to have the affirmation from her that it is normal to feel this way, and that my body really did need the rest. It's worth thinking about how you will take care of him when you get to that point (lining up help with caring for your 3-year-old, getting a housecleaner, having DH take on more chores, etc.).

    You should also be prepared not to work until you pop, regardless of how your boss feels about pregnant people. My OB said she would give me a note saying I needed to work part-time (or go on short-term disability) whenever I felt I needed it. That way, it wasn't a question of asking my boss for a favor -- it was a medical necessity. You may get lucky and be fine working until you deliver, but that's relatively uncommon with twins.

    Hope this helps -- good luck!
     
  6. jnholman

    jnholman Well-Known Member

    This kind of stuff just cracks me up. I hate it when these books make you feel that you are diseased and need special treatment. I work in a male dominated field and I was not going to have any of that crap. I wanted to be treated equally, therefore, there is no napping at work. I just do my work.

    My big boss did not even know I was pregnant with twins. That was my goal. He knew that I came to work everyday and worked my fair share of OT.

    I feel great and get plenty of rest when I am not at work.

    Be how you feel, that is my simple advice.

    Jenn
     
  7. Rach28

    Rach28 Well-Known Member

    I also have and read the book and decided only to pay attention to what I needed. I was advised to stop working by my OB at around 26 weeks but ended up being off for practically the whole pregnancy anyway (m/s, bleeding, back seizures etc). I wouldnt take all she says as written in stone. The nutrition info is good and the weight gain is a good guideline though I gained faster, but I wouldnt worry too much about the rest. Just dip into it and take what you need :)
     
  8. marcy874

    marcy874 Well-Known Member

    I used it mostly for the nutritional information also, although I don't think I consumed near the daily calories she reccomends. Shakes and mandatory snacks were my friends though. ;) I went to a multiples/high risk specialist for my first visit, but after waiting for him for 2 1/2 hours, then he proceeded to scare the crap out of us, we switched to another recommended OB. She just told me my entire pregnancy to listen to my body and do what I felt comfortable with. She also would have given me a medical note to leave or cut back at work whenever I felt I needed it, but I never did. I had a desk job and just made sure to put my feet up, drink a lot of water and eat my snacks. Fortunately, I never had any issues and worked until the week before I had the girls. I only had a few days off before that because it was the Thanksgiving holiday, then I just took a couple extra days until my induction. I had them at 38 1/2 weeks.
     
  9. beachbum

    beachbum Active Member

    I guess everyone feels really differently about these things and will have a different experience.
    My doctor never mentioned Dr. Luke, but pretty much recommended the same things she did in her book. I am a SAHM and quit doing all cooking, shopping and housework 27 weeks. I also found some help (not all day, but most of it) for my 3 yr old.

    I gave my Doc a really hard time about the recommendations. I told him that no one else seemed to have these same strict guidelines etc. His answer was
    "I have a busy practice go Doctor shopping if you want to....I'm telling you what I think is best, and the best shot you have at full term babies. "

    Here I am sitting at 37 + weeks. I can't say I enjoyed bed rest....But it did make me a believer. The two other women I know that have twins and did not follow bed rest instructions did have their babies early. While my experience is just an anacdote, I believe Dr. Luke's advice is based in real scientific research.
     
  10. flygirlcdh

    flygirlcdh Well-Known Member

    I am currently reading this book to and just got through the part about bed rest. What I "love" about it is that she "assumes" we all have all the money in the world or something. My family can't afford to live off one income, luckily my husband has a second job right now. I do home child care and already lost my main client when they found out I was pregnant with twins they assumed I would have to many doctor appointments and not try to work around their schedule (the kids were picked up at 3 so I easily could have scheduled it for after that). Anyway and then if you get put on bedrest she suggested hiring a nanny or getting "free help". Everyone I know either charges for services (other providers) or has a job of their own. And I would have already had to quit my job where do I get the extra money for childcare while I sit at home and do nothing. I can see the inportance of this but realistically not only rich people have twins. Don't get me wrong I'm not complaining about being poor here cause I'm not. Just don't have an extra $160 a week to spend on child care on top of my increase of $200 a month in food I need to eat. (Meat is expensive). So even thought the book seems informative I do not believe I'll be living by it.
     
  11. Chillers

    Chillers Well-Known Member

    Like most of the other posters, I read the book and took it not with a grain of salt...but a large shaker full! :D

    I loved the dietary type of food suggestion (there was no way on god's green earth I was going to be able to eat 3500 cals/day!)

    But everything else I followed my OB's advice and took it easy when I felt like I needed to.
     
  12. Sofiesmom

    Sofiesmom Well-Known Member

    I heard about the book, but it didn't sound it was for me. I asked my ob about the 24lbs by 24 weeks (or 20lbs by 20 weeks, whatever it was) and she said, please no! I've had a very good pregnancy, listened to my body (and my OB), ate what I could and wanted, gained 43lbs and gave birth to 2 almost 8lbs children. I think I did just fine ... without the book. Common sense is what I usually believe in!
     
  13. dowlinal

    dowlinal Well-Known Member

    The first time I started reading the book I had to put it down because it freaked me out so much. After Christmas I picked it up again and finally read it through. Like a lot of the other posters here, I think the nutrition section is pretty good, but the rest just isn't possible in my world. I am a SAHM mom to two pre-schoolers, I am doing my best to take care of myself and to get as much rest as possible, but my reality is that I have two other kids to care for.
     
  14. pdellinger

    pdellinger Active Member

    QUOTE(Minette @ Jan 13 2009, 11:52 AM) [snapback]1145134[/snapback]
    But I did find her pretty alarmist. I finally decided that she sees her primary job as preventing premature birth of multiples -- or, if premature birth cannot be avoided, making sure the babies weigh as much as possible when they arrive. But most of the bad/scary things she discusses will not happen to any given person, so it's not worth freaking out about them.

    She just wants you to be prepared for all possibilities, know the warning signs if you see them, and be prepared to advocate for yourself and your babies (with your OB, your spouse, your boss, your parents, whoever), because most people don't understand that a twin pregnancy is not like a singleton pregnancy with just a little more weight gain.

    Most of those recommendations (for resting, not doing chores, etc.) will make a lot more sense further along. I basically lived like a normal pregnant person (except for the near-constant eating) until I was about 22 weeks, but after that, my discomfort increased dramatically and I felt like I couldn't do nearly as much as I used to. At that point, it was helpful to have the affirmation from her that it is normal to feel this way, and that my body really did need the rest. It's worth thinking about how you will take care of him when you get to that point (lining up help with caring for your 3-year-old, getting a housecleaner, having DH take on more chores, etc.).

    You should also be prepared not to work until you pop, regardless of how your boss feels about pregnant people. My OB said she would give me a note saying I needed to work part-time (or go on short-term disability) whenever I felt I needed it. That way, it wasn't a question of asking my boss for a favor -- it was a medical necessity. You may get lucky and be fine working until you deliver, but that's relatively uncommon with twins.

    Hope this helps -- good luck!


    I agree! I wish that I'd told my boss at 16 wks when we found out that my cervix was pretty short that either (a) I'd work part-time or (b) I'll be on full bed rest soon. Instead I wimped out and thought "Oh, it'll be OK". I think that the company would have ended up much happier as would I had I been more forthcoming about the possibilities. I may have even avoided strict bedrest until further along in my pregnancy. Though I do think that your doctor should be the one who says, "OK, now you need extra rest or you'll be out of commission soon" and not a book. But DON'T be ready to work until the end. My sis did that with her singleton and still regrets it. She was completely miserable. Give yourself a break if at all possible. You deserve it!
     
  15. heathertwins

    heathertwins Well-Known Member

    I think for me I saw the book as a bit of an eye opener to TRY to eat more and not be as concerned with low fat, but more higher calories. It made me realize that carrying twins is unique and high risk. I won't comment on work since people need to make money, but on your off work hours you might want to decrease your load as best you can.

    Someone on here mentioned that the great thing about a twin pg is that you can eat as much, of whatever you want and not feel guilty. It is the only time in your life you can do that. So I thought that was a very positive way to look at it.

    I also kept in mind when I was out shopping, to stop and eat even if it was Mc Donalds.

    Heather
     
  16. megan smith

    megan smith Well-Known Member

    I wish I had known when I was having the twins about not vacuuming, mopping or tub cleaning LOL. My DH would have loved that!
     
  17. adelafor

    adelafor Member

    I am 38 years old and in my 30th weekand still working full time. I can't nap during the day, but I do go to bed earlier and lie down when I come home from work. On weekends I try to take it easy. I eat when I am hungry and drink alot. Protein shakes are a great way to get the protein you need. Otherwise, I'm a normal person. My OB does alot of high risk pregnancies, but told me there is no reason to feel like I am high risk just because I am older, had fertility treatments, and am carrying twins. I am a first time mom, and I keep expecting him to tell me to slow down, but at our appointments he does his thing and says 'looks good, see you next time'.
    It seems alot of women here have said listen to your body, and I agree. I vacuum, but take breaks. I shop, but maybe just for an hour or 2 at a time. Our philosophy has been anything with moderation, and our OB seems to agree. If preterm labor occurs, its a different ballgame but it doesn't occur with everyone!
    I read alot of books, and have enjoyed the 'what your baby looks like this week' but I stopped reading when it seemed the authors were trying to make you alarmed at absolutely everything. I did take a twins class which was helpful because it talked about the logistics associated wtih taking 2 babies home, and also labor. But otherwise I'm trying to be normal!
    Good luck!
     
  18. AmynTony

    AmynTony Well-Known Member

    I found Barbara Luke completely useless - I worked until 3 days before I had the twins - and felt good up until that time...my DH did take over alot of the housework and since we didn't have other kids I COULD sleep all day on the weekends and re-charge...

    I also had a desk job and would get up and walk around for a few minutes each hour...I just felt that she was horribly alarmist and that if you didn't listen to exactly what she said to do, you'd wind up with small sick babies...
     
  19. caba

    caba Banned

    I actually own the book and didn't pay all that much attention to it. What I did pay attention to was my doctor and my body. When I started having BH contrax at 28 weeks, I started working full time from home. I didn't deliver until 36w3d, pretty much as soon as I went off the terbutaline. My kids were fine, and came home from the hospital with me.

    The book has some great suggestions, but it's not like if you don't follow it you will give birth at 30 weeks, and if you do follow it you will make it to 38. All our bodies are different. Listen to your body and listen to your doctor. That's the best advice I can give someone. Oh, and drink more water than you think it is possible for a human being to drink in a given day. :D

    Ya know, I just pulled out this book again, now that I'm preg with the triplets, and I still don't think there is all that much info in it.
     
  20. mandyfish3

    mandyfish3 Well-Known Member

    I really didn't like this book at all. I felt like I was doomed after I read it! I really wanted something more uplifting!! I felt this book was totally unrealistic and negative. But that's just me!
     
  21. teafor2

    teafor2 Well-Known Member

    I like the part of the book that dealt with reactions to finding out you're carrying multiples. For the first few weeks I was very freaked out and even a little disappointed...and on top of that I felt guilty for feeling that way since we'd been TTC for so long and went through IVF (so its not like we didn't know twins were possible!). The chapter in the book about the stages of shock/depression/denial/acceptance, etc was really, really helpful for me. I think the rest of it is a little crazy. Especially, as pp said - the part that says you should nap 2x a day for 30 minutes and only work 25 hours a week! Ha! As if that is a possibility for 99% of us.

    The funny thing is - as crazy as I thought it was, I sent it to my mom because she wasn't getting how different a twin pregnancy could be. She didn't get why I was scared, and she kept telling me how she only gained THIRTEEN POUNDS when she was pregnant with me! So I felt like giving her that book could shock her into believing my concerns and needs. Hopefully it won't scare her too much in the process!
     
  22. IcelandGA

    IcelandGA Active Member

    I had not heard of this book until a few wks ago when a friend gave it to me. I'm 26 weeks so trying to catch up to the weight gain goals has been fun :) but it's also stressed me out! I have not gained alot of weight so far but the doc says the babies are gaining like they should. But it made me feel like I was starving my babies! I just can't eat as much as they recommend. But I loved the endorsement of ICE CREAM. :)

    I work full time too and laying down 30 mins a day ain't gonna happen. It's a desk job, I take it easy, elevate my legs, etc. My OB has not said anything about bedrest or leaving work early either. I say work with your doctor and their recommendations. Oh and eat ice cream! Enjoy your pregnancy and congratulations!
     
  23. carmenandwhittsmom

    carmenandwhittsmom Well-Known Member

    I remember reading that and thinking, they must be insane! I worked up until right before my c-section at 38 weeks. I worked from home starting at about 28 weeks (don't remember exactly). Of course, since I couldn't fit behind the wheel, it made sense. I ate what I wanted when I wanted but I didn't pig out. I gained 50 lbs, my doctors were pleased, and I had no complications. Like everyone else, I say listen to your body and enjoy your pregnancy!
     
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