I'm worried, should I get her checked out?

So my girls just turned two at the end of last month. My one DD has been ahead of my other DD a majority of their short life. In everything from walking to talking. I don't think I would be as worried if my husband didn't constantly harp on the fact that he thinks something is wrong with DD. He thinks she has just stopped being interested in learning. Since I am with them constantly maybe it is like seeing someone all the time so you don't notice that they look different. I know that she is behind my other DD but isn't that just normal with twins? She definitly knows a lot of words however her pronunciation is not that great. She often leaves off the first sound of a word. Ook for book. She also still uses animal sounds for the names of animals instead of using the actual animal name. She doesn't always mimic new words. I feel she lacks confidence and sees her sister taking over and I mean taking over in everything. DD just has that personality. Talks constantly. Needs constant attention. It is no wonder my other DD is behind. Contrary to my DD who is ahead, my lagger has a much better attention span. She will play by herself. But she also talks to herself in jibberish. Is that still normal at this age? She is a VERY stubborn little girl. I have noticed that when she wants to do something she will do it on her own terms. She will not be made to do anything. Whereas my other DD is a pleaser and will do just about anything you ask of her. So anyways...I guess I want to know if anyone else has such a obvious difference in their twins learning. Does the other seem to catch up. Could this mean long term learning problems? Should I get her checked out?
Thanks in advance for any advice!

 

Sounds like your girls are very similar to mine. My one DD held her head first, sat up first, crawled first, walked first, pretty much everything physical first. Like yours my other DD is very stubborn. We are potty training right now and DD that does most things first was easy to train and is just about done. I ask stubborn DD if she wants to go on the potty and she says "no, not today". :lol:

I wouldn't worry at all. Both of my girls are pretty even with things now, my one that does most things first talked a little later than the other, but now they are both just little talkers. My one DD that always did things first physically doesn't ride a tricycle as well as my other DD so you may see some of that as your girls get older. One won't always do things first.

 

Sounds like mine, too. DD is way ahead in speech & learning! But DS is ahead physically. He doesn't talk like she does...doesn't pretend play like she does (that I can tell), isn't as interested in reading. DD is learning colors & numbers; he's not interested. She's ready for potty training; he wants nothing to do with it.

Other than sometimes worrying about his speech, I'm not concerned. No 2 kids do things at the same age; if your girls had been born separately, would you expect them to do things at the same age? But I also think - it never hurts to ask. I would take your dh with you, though. I know my dh sometimes has to hear things from someone other than me. If all's well, it'll put his mind at ease. It's so hard not to compare, (easier said than done!) I have to remind myself all the time.

 

Thanks so much you guys. Sometimes you just need that reminder. It is funny that you say that even the slower one is better at some things than the faster one. My slow starter is learning to swim like a fish. She just did it on her own. Obviously something that she just loves to do so stubbourness didn't win out on this one. My one DD is showing a lot of signs of wanting to potty train the other has no interest. PP is so right...would you compare them and expect the same from them both if they were born at separate times?

 

Mine do things at different rates, and it is obvious to me that they simply have different learning styles. We call one the "sniper", her mind zeroes in on one thing at a time, she is so focused and will keep at something until she gets it. We call the other the "shotgun", her mind is on many things at once, she doesn't seem to focus on any one thing, seems to have a very short attention span for most things, yet she somehow doesn't miss anything. They are both very smart, just in different ways.

One thing I will say, if you are having concerns about development. My daughter (the shotgun), did have some hearing issues as an infant. It effected her ability to balance, so she wasn't walking when her sister was, and it effected her speech. There was fluid building up in her inner ear, so it wasn't obvious that there was a problem. The fluid was drained, and she started walking within days. By kindergarten her speech was up to par. It was a simple problem that was easily corrected.

You know your kids best, but it never hurts to get a dr's opinion if you just aren't sure. Better the have the dr. tell you there's nothing at all wrong, than let something simple go too long before catching it.

 

we have the same thing going on here with two boys. I can't even look at them as twins b/c they are so opposite in EVERYTHING. Aiden is ahead in gross motor skills but Noah is ahead in language and cognition. I have found that working with kids that they focus on certain skills at a time and then the other skills another time. It also doesn't help that Aiden being behind in language is so laid back he doesn't care if he gets grilled cheese instead of mac n cheese and will watch anything that Noah seems to like. If I ask Aiden a question Noah jumps right in with a reply. Very difficult to get him to answer yes/no questions or even make a choice. Put them in a pool and Aiden is indepedently floating with a bubble and arm floats. Noah has no interest. Crazy how different they are which is why I say I have 2 boys born on the same day vs. twin boys.

 

It sounds like both of your girls are doing fine developmentally, and there is a difference in personality. I wouldn't worry about it.

 

While I can't offer any advice, I can tell you that your DD sounds very similiar to my DS. He will turn 2 next month and I sometimes worry about his speech. He has made SO much progess over the last 6 months going from 6 words to 30-40 and even a few 2 word phrases. However, he still uses animal sounds instead of their names, doesn't mimic new sounds, and leaves out sounds of pretty much every word he says. I know what he is saying, but people who aren't around him much would have no idea.

He says things like "buh buh" for bubbles, "ha" for hi or high, and "ow" in a high pitched voice for "meow." All his words still seem like approximations to me, so like you I'm not sure if I should worry. Many times I have been worried about speech related things with him and he seems to come around, so hopefully the same will be true here. If you do get her evaluated I'd be very curious what they think.

Good luck!

 

Thanks so much for posting this. My boys are younger than your children but I have similar concerns. It's nice to hear I'm not alone. I hope everything will work out over time. I try my best NOT to compare but sometimes you just can't help it...