Is my child just one of those kids that is done with naps this early?

Discussion in 'The Toddler Years(1-3)' started by 5280babies, Jan 30, 2011.

  1. 5280babies

    5280babies Well-Known Member

    Okay, I am out of options. Lost all hope. Etc. Etc. Etc. So I am posting with one last ditch effort to see if someone can either suggest something I have not tried or just tell me that some kids are just this way and I might as well just go on with life and stop stressing about it. We will just leave Zoe out of the matter because she is not the problem. It is Jude. We switched to toddler beds on Nov. 20th - so 2 months ago. The night time has never really been a problem. Naps are an absolute nightmare. I have tried every technique...including just recently placing her back in bed 150+ times in a sitting without saying one word. For over a week and DH helped and he is also frustrated beyond belief. One time I did it for 2.5 hours solid. To try to fix sleep debt I put them to bed at 5:30/6:00 pm and they won't sleep until 8 pm. So every night no matter what time bedtime is 8:00 pm seems to be the golden time they end up falling asleep. About 1 month ago I went back to a 6:30 pm bedtime for DH and my sanity so I could care less if they babble until 8 pm but I really want those naps. I can no longer split them - didn't help with Jude anyway - we have moved our bedroom upstairs and we just don't have a big enough house for everyone to have their own rooms. Their room is completely babyproofed - I cannot trust either one of them anywhere else - they can scale the pnps from both sides. Jude can use a doorknob to hoist herself up if that gives you any inclination of her climbing abilities. I am fit to be tied. Is this girl done with naps? Do I just put her on the couch for quiet time with a TV show and tell her she cannot get down? Jude sleeps 8 pm - 5:30/6 am consistently for a month now. I have no choice but to get up immediately when she is up so I can remove her from her room so that her sister can sleep (Zoe will sleep until 7:30 or 8). My worst fear has happened. It has become painfully obvious that Jude is lasting on 11-12 hours of sleep total a day whereas Zoe is getting/needing more like 15+. My free time in the mornings is gone (I was getting up at 5:30 am for my "me" time) and now evidently I don't get any during naps. I feel like I have tried everything. If Jude does happen to nap she is a bear when she wakes up and has a huge temper tantrum for like 2 hours. If she stays awake all day Zoe is not ready to go to bed at 5:30 pm because she just took a 2.5 hour nap! Ugh - I knew fraternals could be different but I am really losing it here. The kicker is the girls are really well behaved otherwise. I have (knock on wood) had little problems - we use the quiet place (basically our time out place) for discipline and have since 16 mos - it really kicked in a couple months ago but I can't use that at naptime - they would rather be in their quiet place. Suggestions? Or, again, does this just sound like one of those kids? Thank you from a desperate mom.
  2. MrsWright

    MrsWright Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    I'll tell ya...our naps were a disaster about 3wks after switching the boys into toddler beds. Climbing everything, pulling clothes out, ect. I didn't want anything tipping over on them or them falling off of something so rather than putting the beds back into cribs we just turned them around so the open side was facing the wall. Essentially they are back in cribs again....naps are peaceful again....
    For what its worth maybe they aren't ready? Mine can get of their beds but for some reason they never do until we go in there to get them up anyways.
  3. MarchI

    MarchI Well-Known Member

    Why did you move them to toddler beds? With them so young, I would put them back into the cribs for now and save the bed for later.
  4. 5280babies

    5280babies Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the article but I don't think this child falls into the To us there was no option. Jude is a massive climber and she can get any lock, zipper, button, snap, etc. open. She can rip the tags out of taggie blankets - I am not exaggerating...she needles and prys at things and uses her teeth until she can work the stitching loose. You know when you have a stuffed animal that says not for under 3 because of the eyes but you think how on earth could any child get those eyes off of that stuffed animal? Well she is the kind of that child that label was created for. She is only 20 lbs and climbed from her crib to Zoe's and then fell out of her crib 3 times (after she was trying to sit on top of it and balance.) The cribs are gone and not coming back. I promise I am not being obstinate - I have read every book and tried all the suggestions I know of for weeks at a time. The transition was nothing for bedtime. They play an hour (this is always how it was in their cribs too) and climb into their beds and sleep. They fell out a couple times that first week and have not since. Zoe climbs in and naps with Jude not there and many times when she is there wreaking havoc. It really is the naptime for Jude only. Which is why I am really curious to know if anyone else out there had an experience like this early on with their kids and that my anxiety around the toddler bed thing is really more about her sleep needs are just a lot less and I need to accept that. She is tightly wound. Thanks - I know I am a pain. But I cannot be the only one who has been through this kind of experience I hope. I guess I have to live with the decision no matter what of being done with cribs, but there was no way I was going to have her falling and breaking an arm. Sigh.
  5. Rollergiraffe

    Rollergiraffe Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    I was going to say crib tent, but if she can undo the zipper then you're kind of out of luck there. It sounds like naps don't really do her much good either if she's crabby when she wakes up. Rather than make it a daily fight, I'd probably just plunk her down for some quiet time in front of the tv or doing a quiet activity every day for a while and see how it goes. Maybe come up with some chores she can 'help' with, like folding laundry or something.

    Sorry that it's so rough.. I sympathize... sometimes naps don't happen around here either and the days are so long. :hug:
  6. scrappycindy

    scrappycindy Well-Known Member

    We moved our girls to toddler beds in Dec (19 mo) The night time transition went very well. One night of crying and that was it. Occasionally one will cry when we put them to bed at night, but it stops in a matter of minutes. We've stripped their room of everything but their beds and a few stuffed toys. We have a super yard gate attaced to window latches blocking off one outlet so we can leave their night light and humidifier. Naptime is just now getting very smooth. My girls have always had generally the same sleep requirements, so I guess that helps us. We don't put them to bed until 8pm though. It seems that if our girls don't go to sleep until then, I wouldn't put them in their rooms so early. My girls sleep until 7am and generally take a 1-2 hour nap during the day. I feel that they get enough sleep. I've just started reading a book at naptime, like we do at bedtime, so I think maybe that is a better cue to lay down and go to sleep. Also, they know, say and understand the word sleep, so I tell them to lay on their beds and go to sleep.
    I hope your naptime can smooth itself out. I was pretty leary changing to toddler beds so early (1 climber) but thankfully, it's all worked pretty well.
  7. kingeomer

    kingeomer Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Betsy :hug: I switched my DD to a toddler bed at 19 months because she was a climber, so I did do an early transition with one child. However, her naps were only off for about 2-3 weeks then she got back on track. From what you are describing though, she's super cranky when she does have a nap and seems to do well without one and sleeps well from 8pm and on...I agree with Jen, she just might be done. :hug:
    I would also do quiet time with her. If she doesn't bug her sister while she is sleeping then I'd give her some books and quiet toys to keep her occupied and tell her that this is her quiet time and she has to be quiet for her sister and you. If she does bug her sister, is there another room in the house where she'll be safe where you can lay a pillow or blanket and give her some items to keep her occupied for the designated quiet time? (I would tell her that this is her special quiet time space).
  8. lianyla

    lianyla Well-Known Member

    This is a tough one because you have no ALONE time IF she doesn't nap. UGH. Is there anywhere you can put her for quiet time so that you can be alone? This would be a MUST for me. I don't care what they're doing as long as they're not w/ me all day long!

    That does seem early to give up naps, in my opinion, but my mom said my brothers (twins) stopped at 8 MONTHS!

    Anyway, go with your gut. Do you think she needs the nap or not? If so, I'd find a nap spot for her so that you don't have to stress about her waking up the other twin. Mine started napping in different rooms at 6 months.

    My boys are 39 months old and still take 3 or 4 hour naps. I would not be okay mentally w/o that right now. I feel for you!
  9. lianyla

    lianyla Well-Known Member

    And i soo know what you mean about one being ready for bed and the other not- happens here when one doesn't sleep! It drives me NUTS!

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