Just can't figure out the sleep issue...

Discussion in 'The First Year' started by 5280babies, Aug 19, 2009.

  1. 5280babies

    5280babies Well-Known Member

    Can anyone offer any suggestions? This is how my LOs patterns have been playing out. I realize I am getting a good chunk in the evening. This is a change as before it took us hours to get them asleep by 11 or midnight, but the frequent night wakings are killing me. It was worse the last month believe it or not but we started rice cereal 7 days ago and it had gotten better for 4 of those days, then we just reverted back. I am envious of those who have the 6 or 7 pm - 7 am sleepers...

    4:30 pm or 5:00 pm - rice cereal feed - 1 tsp mixed with BM (30-45 mins after breastfeed)
    play in between
    6:00 pm - 7:00 pm - bath, last feed, and cuddle to bed
    7:30 pm - usually have one or both wake up in about 30 mins and we instantly rock or nurse back down in less than 10 mins
    12:30 - 1:30 am - one wakes for feed
    2:30 am - other wakes for feed
    4:30 am - both wake for feed
    6:00 am - both wake again (but I do not feed)
    7:30 am - 8:00 am (latest) - up for day - not interested in eating usually until they have been up about an hour

    They are eating every 2 hours during the day, for about 3-5 minutes. Maybe I should make them wait 3 hours? I feel like I have tried every trick in the book.

    I keep the room dark, 70 degrees, have a white noise CD playing, have them dressed warmly, run the humidifier otherwise they wake up conjested. They go to sleep happy. We cannot swaddle anymore as both LOs move around the crib a lot. If they are not in sleepers they are in sleep sacks. I have read every book - I just cannot figure this out. When they eat in the middle of the night they do start out aggressively like they are really hungry but after a couple minutes are asleep - I lay them back down and back to bed. By the 4 a.m. though I cannot fall back asleep anymore, so I just get up or lay there and that makes for a painful afternoon the next day - because they are not napping well either. In fact, I don't know when these girls sleep! This is the worst it has been - I am stumped. They are not even cranky during the day - all smiles and laughs - wish I could say the same for myself. Thanks :blink:
  2. ambernruby

    ambernruby Well-Known Member

    Gosh that does sound tough but at least they aren't miserable as well as you! Months 3-5.5mths for us were hell on earth! I tried everything also and ended up doing CIO which thankfully saved my life, are you open to CIO at some point?
  3. LMW1015

    LMW1015 Well-Known Member

    I just wanted to send a great big hug. I have struggled with my LO's sleeping from Day 1. Your night schedule looks about like mine was up until this past Friday night when I finally did CIO. My LO's will be 9 months old next week and I finally had to break down and do CIO. I didn't really want to but seriously - they're almost 9 months and I'm pregnant again. We all need sleep. Things are much better now. Have you read HSHHC? I'd gone over it but not really "read" it until last week when I got desperate. ;) Just wanted to wish you luck and sympathize with you.
  4. sweetypies

    sweetypies Well-Known Member

    Mine are FF, but until they were almost 4 months I fed them every 3 hours day and night... maybe there were some nights when whey were eating every 4 hours. At 4 months I've started lengthening the time between feedings. At first, after 3.5 hours everybody was screaming, including me. I don't remember exactly, but gradually we got to 4 hours between feedings and one feeding during the night. Now I put them to sleep between 7pm and 8pm, sometimes 8:30pm and they eat the next bottle (that's only 4 ounces) between 2:30am and 5am. Sometimes they wake at 3am and I go prepare the bottle, and by the time I'm done they are back to sleep until 5am. If they wake up before 2am, I don't feed them, maybe give them some water if they are really crying. I plan to stop the night feeding altogether. They don't really eat the entire 4 ounces.
    GL and let us know how it's going.
  5. tinalb

    tinalb Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    I'll be honest, I don't know what advice to give you. It sounds like you are doing everything just right. I found between 4 & 6 months to be some of the most difficult times. :hug: Are they falling asleep on their own when they go down for the night or do they fall asleep eating? Can they be soothed back to sleep in the night any way besides eating?
  6. maritza211

    maritza211 Well-Known Member

    Hi..... how long did the they CIO before they starting sleeping well thru the night?
  7. 5280babies

    5280babies Well-Known Member

    One thing I am trying to figure out is the feeding. Until about 6 weeks ago they have always fed 3 hours apart, sometimes even 4 hours. Then I got my one LO back exclusively BFing and I am now tandem feeding half the feedings (I must be doing 10-12 feedings a day...crazy). Well, the other one followed suit so they are both frequent eaters now. They are highly distractible...I just made nursing necklaces a couple days ago...they are helping a little. So you think I should try to follow a rigid schedule and they will learn to eat more regularly in time and quantity? This means they will have a tough day right? Especially if they are used to eating every 2 hours.

    Occasionally I get lazy and let one or the other fall asleep nursing, but usually they are not quite asleep, I lay them down, they make their nest and are down in a couple minutes (different story with naps but I am more concerned right now about nighttime.) I have thoroughly read and re-read HSHHC. This age seems difficult to me to determine whether to cut off their feeds in the middle of the night? I am worried about a possible growth spurt. They are very very active during the day and they are definitely teething. If they are really fussy I do baby tylenol but I don't want to do that every night. Of course, they sleep better on those nights but after a couple nights I stopped because they were no longer fussy. I guess I could try just getting them back to sleep in the night rather than feeding? I don't think I am ready for CIO just yet. I may have to get bottles ready for my DH to take over - of course we are going through this madness where they are very clingy to me and although during the day they love their daddy, they only want me at bedtime. :huh:
  8. 5280babies

    5280babies Well-Known Member

    Down the line I think I would definitely consider CIO - but I feel like they may be a little young. One is quite temperamental when she wants to be so I am not sure CIO will ever work with her. They do great most of the day until late afternoon when they both start wanting mommy's arms (but also don't want to share those arms at the same time!) So I am lucky in that area, you are right!
  9. Danibell

    Danibell Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    They are a little young for full blown cio in my opinion, but not for full on fussing! ;)

    My dd has been restless since birth. She did the majority of her night sleeping with me in my bed for the first several months. When they started sleeping through the night without eating (around 3-3.5 months) I decided it was time for her to learn how to go to sleep and stay asleep in the crib.

    What I did was similar to CIO except I never let her cry for more than a few mins because of her age. If it was at bedtime, I would get them ready for bed, lay them down awake, turn on the fan, the lullabies and the nightlight, and walk out. Every time she would cry for just a few mins, I would go back in, settle her back down in the bed, and walk back out, without making eye contact, ignoring her smiles, and without picking her up at all.

    It took a couple of nights but not long for them both to go to sleep fairly easily.

    As for night wakings, I do the same thing, turn the lullabies back on, insert paci's, snuggle blankets and go back to bed. For the most part they no longer cry at night unless there is a problem, they just squirm and moan and groan. If I've already given the paci's back a couple of times I'll just pull the covers up over my ear (they are still in our room so I can still hear them) and ignore them. They go to sleep by the time the lullabies are over (they play for 45 mins).

    It's a very simplified/easier version of CIO and isn't near as harsh on mommy or on baby. I never did it this early with my singleton's but I've quickly realized that all the rules go out the window when there are twins involved ;)

    It really sounds to me like they are waking out of habit, rather than a need for anything specific.
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