Refuses to poop! NEED HELP!!

My daughters are potty trained, but my one twin REFUSES to poop since we've started wearing big girl panties. She won't poop in the potty or in her panties. I have tried putting her back in diapers, but she won't poop in them either. I took her to the Dr. yesterday to see if there was a physical problem, and there isn't. It's an emotional issue. The Meanwhile we are pushing the juice, fluids and fiber as well as doing enema's. The Dr. said she's pretty backed up. This is so yucky. She is utterly miserable, crying and always wanting to be held. Anyone have an experience like this?? How do I make her understand that she HAS to poop? She HAS to push her poop out. I don't know what to do. Please help.

 

My daughters are potty trained, but my one twin REFUSES to poop since we've started wearing big girl panties. She won't poop in the potty or in her panties. I have tried putting her back in diapers, but she won't poop in them either. I took her to the Dr. yesterday to see if there was a physical problem, and there isn't. It's an emotional issue. The Meanwhile we are pushing the juice, fluids and fiber as well as doing enema's. The Dr. said she's pretty backed up. This is so yucky. She is utterly miserable, crying and always wanting to be held. Anyone have an experience like this?? How do I make her understand that she HAS to poop? She HAS to push her poop out. I don't know what to do. Please help.

 

Is it possible to let her wear a pull up until she gets over it?
I hate to see her regress because of it otherwise.

 

My neice has/has the same problem--she was much older before she got over it--like around 8. Unfortunately, I think you are doing all you can.

 

You might give her some mineral oil. It will at least make it easier for her to poop when she finally decides to.

 

Does she like incentives? As in a new toy/ money/ shopping trip whatever to basically bribe her?

It's going to hurt for awhile since she's held it in so long.

Then it'll get better.

Have you told her that her tummy pain will go away when she poops? I remember having to explain that to my dd when she was about 3.

I hope you can connect with her. So she gets it overwith quickly and on to the next phase!

 

How sad is this? We were at a friend's wine and cheese party last night. Great wine, nice jazz music playing...great party. Somehow, a group of us started talking about this exact subject.

It seemed like everyone had at least one child that was currently experiencing this or had it in the past (including our son). A couple of our friends said they actually took their child to see a GI specialist at Children's Hospital. They were told that its common for a newly trained child to hold their poop after experiencing a painful bowel movement. The fear of having that pain drives them to hold it to prevent the possiblity of having it again. Of course, it ends up much worst for them.

In all cases, the key was to keep them very regular. Giving a little something to keep their #2's soft and painless. One friend swares by alittle mineral oil. The other gives "aloe vera extract". It's a tasteless liquid available at health stores. It's just enough to keep things moving well. They can't hold it back. Once its comfortable to BM...they seem to get on track with going on the potty. Good luck. Hoping for the best here too.

 

I used to babysit a little girl who had this problem. They had to do enema's to get her to poop. Her little tummy was so distended. They just told her going poop was normal and let her watch them go poop. They also told her it was important to poop and that if she had to go - she should go - even in her panties if she had to.

They also fed her alot of applesauce and prunes. It took a LONG time for her to get over this.

I would also try (won;t be easy with twin sister and new baby) to give her some quality one on one time. Make her feel special and give LOTS of treats and rewards for going pee on the potty.

Patience is the key here. B/c any stress you have is just passing onto her and making her feel worse and hold it in more!!

Good luck.

 

Allison has been going through that and recently got out of it by herself. She would wait until she just could not hold it anymore then go in her pants. It was horrible. She is now finally getting a bit better.

 

I don't want to give you more horror stories...but ...my neice went through this... she potty trained at age two...just fine...except the pooping. My sister wound up having to put her on semi-permanent meds for it b/c she was starting to have bloody stools. Well... a year later she is finally weaned of the meds, but pooping is still a major ordeal in my sister's house. The only thing I can say is what I did with my dd... she was initially afraid of pooping, so I would literally sit there hugging her while she sat on the potty...I would rub her belly, reassure her a 1000 times that it was okay..that everyone did it... I would go through a list of everyone one she knew saying, "So and so goes poopy on the potty...and so and so goes poopy too.." etc... I would give her books to read and encourage her to take her time on the potty instead of jumping off of it to play. Pump up the fiber and liquids..cut out all cheese and as much of those really sticky carbs like rice and potatoes as you can.... Black beans are great and my sister's ped recommended corn too... prune juice mixed with other juices are good too. My sister started a new thing this fall that helped...whenever her dd was backed up or hadn't pooped in more than a day she had a rule...she would make her sit on the potty for at least 10 minutes after every meal until she pooped. She would put the kitchen timer on so that her dd knew she wouldn't have to sit there indefinitely. She was allowed to read or play with a simple toy, but couldn't get off... the discipline of having to sit for a little while definitely helped her. I think it's really important to try to constantly reassure ...and if she will go in her pull-up then let her for now... better to deal with the pull-up than to have constipation issues for years. My sister's ped told her that in most of these cases diet is not the issue..it's a willful holding in either related to fear or not wanting to take the time...the problem is that it becomes a cycle b/c the more they hold it in, the worse it hurts, the more fear they have over it...so the meds my niece went on helped to really loosen things for a good six months so that she could get over her fear of it hurting. Then they had to wean her really slowly b/c her body had become dependent on it..they had lots of set backs along the way and I am sooo, sooo thankful that my kids have not had this problem. I think that something you can do for kids who haven't yet potty trained is to really manage their diet well...watch out for constipation..even slight constipation while they are still in diapers..and then talk to them about it..so that they know that you know that they are pooping and that it's a normal thing, albeit stinky thing... gross I know..but I think kids need this reassurance...

 

Can she tell you why she wont? Is she embarrassed? Grossed out?

I would give her a "reward" for doing it. Maybe not the "right" thing to do, but this is important.

Keep us posted!

 

We have poopy issues here with Ian. He does not like to poop. I have added a tspn of Benefiber to his milk in the a.m. and then another tspn of it at lunch. By dinner, he pooped.

TMI - but our kids watch us poop, if they happen to walk in, and we don't make a big deal out of it. They tell us phew and laugh if we toot etc... We say it's natural and everyone has to do it. And when they do it, we tell them great job, high 5's, and then the mantra it's natural and everyone does it at least once a day. They smile and are proud "I poopy!"

However, we have not forced the poopy on the toilet. Right now we are working on peeing in the potty chair. Ian has pooped once in his potty chair and he did not like it. So we are not forcing the issue right now.

 

There is a kids laxative that tastes like root beer - It is called Fletcher's for kids. Publix and Albertson's carry it. Give them one teaspoon and I would say within 6 hrs or so - they should go. Sometimes it has taken overnight but it works like a charm. If this is an emotional issue, it is best to not let her know you are focusing on it. That can make it worse sometimes. If you think she will have an accident - I would just do the pull up until you get her cleared out. Or you can put the plastic panty over her big girl panties (if you do not want to chance her regressing) just in case she does not make it to the potty willingly or un-willingly. Good luck and let us know how it goes.