Treat/Bribes & Potty Training

Okay - so you can tell by my ticker that I am in potty training denial. I was hoping they would just figure this out on their own. Just kidding

I bought gummy bears to use as an incentive. You pee or poop on the potty you get a gummy bear as a reward. I think I have put them on the potty 100+ times today. Phoebe has only peed on the potty once, ever, and didn't do it at all today. But she sat on the toilet and "tried" so I gave her a gummy. Is that wrong? Should I hold out and only give her one if she pees or poos? I felt like I had to reward her for trying.

Archer was asking to pee on the toilet every 10 minutes. Drove me nuts. Got nothing done today, my neck hurts and I am grumpy. joy. I don't think I am going to survive this potty training thing. I don't have the patience!

So if you used or are using treats as a reward, is it working for you? Should I do stickers on a calendar instead??

 

I think it depends on each child. One did good with the jelly beans/m&m's and the other did better with the sticker chart and presents from the dollar store after so many stickers. You have to keep trying until you find the incentive that works for each child. And I think that if she did try, she should get something. We did that as well a few times. Potty training is just not fun. Perhaps it might be easier to train one at a time if one seems more ready? We wound up doing that and even though it was a pain, it worked for us because one was ready a few months before the other. And once the second one was ready, she trained in a couple of days with little accidents...far fewer than my first daughter. You will get through this, I promise...it's just hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel right now. I also refused to stay cooped up at home while training. We have a travel potty in the car so I just used that and it allowed for us to leave and do things as well.

 

We only just started using M&Ms as bribes a couple of weeks ago, and it's working fairly well. However, I think we were well ahead of you when we started. Both Elliot and Clarissa used the toilet fairly regularly, but it was usually only if we asked them (they almost never asked us). We felt like they could be completely potty trained at that point, but just weren't motivated to be for some reason.

Enter the M&Ms.

They get 2 M&Ms for peeing or pooping on the potty, and only if they really go. No treats for trying, no treats for a few drops 5 minutes after they've already gone.

I don't think stickers would work for us, and definitely not a system where they had to go a certain number of times to get a reward. The key for us is instant gratification.

The interesting thing is that after the first week the novelty of the candy started to wear off, so our progress has slowed. Still, we are slowly getting there.

Perhaps yours just aren't quite ready. If they keep asking to go but nothing happens, maybe they don't yet understand their bodies' signals . . . if that's the case, all the bribery in the world won't help. They'll just keep sitting on that potty hoping something happens so they can get their gummy bears. Maybe back off for a couple of weeks (still encouraging them to try, but not making a big deal of it) and then start up again.

Good luck!

Rachel

 

My eldest blew my mind toilet training and we are finally there (or so I think!) My suggestions are: Don't push them at all - if they know you are really desperate for them to use the potty then if they are like my child they won't! I got some bad advice about putting her on often and waiting for her to do her business by accident. She just learnt to hold on really really well!

Treats as rewards have worked for us - for them to work I had to take her to the supermarket and let her choose the reward. No if she doesn't ask for one she doesn't get one and she doesn't always ask so phasing this out should be ok for us or I'll just change the treat to a healthy version.

I got stickers which she put on the potty and that worked for a while before she regressed!

What made all the difference for us was we went to pick out a birthday present and while we were in the store Trelise fell in love with a plastic telephone. I said to her she could have it if she made a whole week with no accident's. At this time she was occasionally doing pee in the potty but never bm and it was always a battle to have her sit on it even if you knew she needed to go! I probably should have made a sticker chart but she focused on that telephone all week and had no accidents so we went back and brought the phone. That was almost a week ago and still no accidents and she is starting to use it all by herself - we are still on treats though.

It's been a long long year!!! Good luck!!!

 

QUOTE
My suggestions are: Don't push them at all -


I agree, don't push it...

I never even tried with mine until after they 3, and it just clicked. I didn't push it, and I was always nice about it, I didn't get angry with them if they had an accident. Also I never used rewards.

 

Thanks ladies. I am backing off a bit. I was getting frustrated and the treat thing went in the wrong direction. I wish it was summer and warm out! Why do they have to stop napping for me in this yucky winter weather when we are stuck in doors?? argh! Well. That's a whole other post topic!

 

I tried gummy treats for Zach to PT as well. He would go a drop and want one. I did not know what to do. So finally I told him he needed to fully pee to get a gummy. I dont think he knew what i meant. that as a few months ago! He is so intermittent. He actually went potty on the plane lavatory on our way back from vacation! I think only because he wanted to get out of his seat like his sister did? :huh: Bt now we are home neither want to sit on potty or wear big boy undies. :huh: :mellow: <_<

 

Hi Dana! Ours kids are almost exactly the same age and I feel your pain! Sarah will pee on the potty but not poop (she claims she's afraid) she will wear underwear but asks for a diaper to poop in. To make matters worse, she has some constipation issues too so our opportunities to poop on the potty are few and far between! Then there is Alex, who has absolutely NO interest in the potty at all. He loves to watch his sister go and says, "Good job, Sarah!!" but never wants to try. I talked to our pedi about it in February and he said to back off for a while and revisit it later. Just wanted to let you know I'm right there with you with the frustration! At this point it's hard for me to imagine Alex EVER being potty trained!

 

We were training for a bit and now we have sort of slacked off a bit...I figure everyone says don't push it, they must mean it for a reason LOL

 

Thanks ladies - Phoebe has real underwear on today. So far so good. They are CARS themed and boy underwear, but whatever works right? Archer did not want to put underwear on at all. I would have been fine had he wanted to wear the pink DORA ones, but no go. So he is running around naked right now. I keep asking if he wants to put a pair on and he says "not right now". hmm.

I am scared to go anywhere! If we do go to our local indoor playspace I will have 10 pairs of underwear with me and 3 changes of clothes! :blink:

Corey - they always say boys are harder to train! So if need be I am going to back off with Archer and focus on Phoebe for now. One at a time. And wow - our kidlets are the same age! 7 days apart! Keep me posted on how this goes for you!