did anyone's kids NOT go to preschool?

Discussion in 'Childhood and Beyond (4+)' started by ddancerd1, Dec 10, 2012.

  1. ddancerd1

    ddancerd1 Well-Known Member

    so we just moved from chicago to NJ... i was going to sign the girls up for preschool starting in january. almost everywhere is already filled up :( the private preschools are ridiculously expensive (like everything else out here), and we just can't afford to send them to those.
    what should i do? how do you people afford preschool? seriously, it's ridiculous! all the affordable ones have no more space for my girls.
    i've been doing "school" with them at home, so that they don't fall behind at all, but i really think they need to be in school, even if it's just 1 day a week.

    i am still checking daycares for their preschool programs. and no, there are no park districts here that offer preschool (or anything, really).

    did anyone's twins NOT go to preschool at all? i mean, *I* didn't go and i turned out fine...

    p.s. the school district's pre-k is also filled up...
  2. megkc03

    megkc03 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Dannielle-knowing everything you do/have done at home, I honestly wouldn't worry. And you have seen what my boys are doing at school, and I've done more with them at home. Don't sweat it. Have them in dance, maybe of you can find art classes, or something else that interests them throughout the year-that would be fine. Really I think it would be fine to forgo it!
  3. lharrison1

    lharrison1 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Reese and Ryder are just doing preschool in the daycare they go to. I'd just see if you can find a curriculum online and do that with the girls at home. You may even be able to get the guidelines on what the school district wants kindergarteners to know before they start and just focus on that, they will be more than fine!! :good:
    1 person likes this.
  4. ddancerd1

    ddancerd1 Well-Known Member

    thanks, guys! i'd rather spend the money on dance classes and other types of classes, to be honest, than on preschool. they'll be in a school setting for YEARS...
  5. jjzollman

    jjzollman Well-Known Member

    I agree with everyone else! Just follow a school-type routine at home with activities sometimes. Find local classes like art, music, drama or something to give them exposure to getting in line, being around other kids - if possible, but not necessary. Contact the school they will be going to for kindergarten and ask for their readiness checklist and focus on those skills.

    They will be fine! :)
  6. rissakaye

    rissakaye Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    My kids didn't do preschool. Sarah's being considered for gifted and talented placement and Timothy is light-years ahead of everyone on math. So I would definitely say it didn't hurt them.

    I would say as long as you're doing something with them, as opposed to turn on the tv and leave them, they'll be okay. If they get used to being away from mom and taking instruction from other adults, even better.

  7. Fran27

    Fran27 Well-Known Member

    I freaked out with prices in NJ too. We found a wonderful coop though that is very reasonable. It's helped my kids a lot BUT I'm not too good at teaching them myself.
  8. ddancerd1

    ddancerd1 Well-Known Member

    yeah, they don't really watch tv. i found it made them cranky and tired afterwards, so i limit it to like one day a week, and it's usually a movie with us. we do "school" (letter a week, number a week, reading, phonics, shapes, math, etc etc)... we do crafts, they help me cook/bake... we do stuff like bead necklaces for the whole manipulative stuff or whatever it's called lol... they play with each other most of the day... they NEVER have a problem being in the kids' room at gyms, and they LOVE dance class. separation from me in those settings was never an issue. the only thing i'm concerned about is that when they start kindergarten, i'm afraid they'll be like little crazy people cuz they're not used to a school setting like all the other kids!
  9. rubyturquoise

    rubyturquoise Well-Known Member

    Only one of mine did (my oldest; he's 21 in a few days), and only because back then we qualified for the state stuff. He was hopelessly bored in K the next year.

    My second one wasn't interested in school type stuff so we didn't even do that. He started K three weeks after turning 5 only knowing the letter A, and is currently majoring in aerospace engineering. (Note: K was less academic in 1999 than it is now.)

    With the girls I worked with them a bit on reading and so on, and they attended the library story program and a once-a-week gymnastics class (for waiting your turn, standing in line, raising your hand, etc). No problems at all with either of them. They are actually in the same class this year for the first time ever because there is only one advanced class for fourth grade.

    It sounds like you have the bases covered and yours will do fine without it.
    2 people like this.
  10. sulik110202

    sulik110202 Well-Known Member

    My kids didn't go to preschool, but their daycare was a definite school environment. I agree with others that as long as you are working with them on letters, numbers and other academics, they should be fine. I think one aspect of preschool is also the socialization aspect, but dance classes and things like that will provide that as well.
  11. sharongl

    sharongl Well-Known Member

    I would just try to get on the lists at the affordable preschools--many times slots open up over winter break--people move, but don't give notice. If you can't get in, just try to find classes--ones that are set up academically like art in addition to the dance. Living in NJ, I can tell you that the curriculum in K is becoming more like 1st grade was, even more so than it was 6 years ago when my kids were in K. I spoke to the 1st grade teacher the other week, and she told me that the stuff they used to do the first 4 months of 1st in math, is now covered in K. They should get used to a circle time atmosphere, in addition to learning how to respond in a classroom situation.

    It won't kill them to not be in pre-k, but the more exposure they get to an academic setting, the easier it will be for them next year. Another option is to look at day camps for the summer. There they are in a group, with a schedule, and loose rules (depending on the camp to how strict they are). But it is a good kick off to learning how a group dynamic works.
  12. Chrissy Nelson

    Chrissy Nelson Well-Known Member

    Although we are not religious people at all I founlittle churches around here that are very low prices that the girls went to for 2 hours a day. I would have never thought to check there until I heard a person suggest it.

    I think it really depends on the child if preschool is "needed" or not.
  13. TwinLove

    TwinLove Well-Known Member

    I did the same as Chrissy. :good:
  14. ddancerd1

    ddancerd1 Well-Known Member

    i've checked churches around here, and they are filled up :( everything that's "affordable" is filled up. i just can't justify paying 800/month PER KID for my girls to play and sing songs and do crafts, when they can do that at home with me. for free lol
    1 person likes this.
  15. TwinLove

    TwinLove Well-Known Member

    Oh hell no! :acute: That's why I did the church preschool... I couldn't pay more for childcare then my mortgage. :faint: Sorry you can't find anything but they will be fine!! :good: Just look at me! .... Hmmmm, maybe it will be worth the money. :p
  16. KCMichigan

    KCMichigan Well-Known Member

    As PP said, I would try to get on a wait list. People drop out, move, etc.

    Also see if your DDs would be able to do something through the schools in that area. In some areas they have a young 5 class that is like PreK, but run through the schools for those kids that just missed the cut-off date. It is usually pretty 'quietly' known because the demand can be high.....BUT often it is only open to kids within a very small age range (young 5s).

    Or maybe start a playgroup that is semi-structured with a few other moms.

    Last, do classes if you can. Then at least there are lots of kids in a structured setting and the girls would be getting used to listening to other adults.

    I think it is really area dependent. Some areas have a high preschool attendance and others are so-so depending on the affordability, availability, and need.

    Here they have quite a few kids that dont go to preschool due to cost/availability and where we lived before almost all kids went to preschool (it was free universal PreK).

    Mine did 3 yr old preschool through a church (inexpensive) 4 hours a week. 4 yr Preschool through a special program since they both had mild special needs and then 'free' PreK at 5. But we did not do K and went straight to 1st due to moving, cut-off dates/birthday, etc.....so I cant imagine what it would have been like without Preschool in our situation!

    I will say that the 4 yr old specialized preschool program was much more like K than the 'free' PreK- with very structured activities (not academically heavy, but more gently guided play due to the nature of the program) The PreK was much more open-ended and not academic at all.Which is not a bad thing-- just different and a reminder that not all preschools will be alike!!

    Classes, playtime at gym kids center, and other group activities should give you the socialization piece. If you are doing letter/number/name writing and other basic K skills at home-- I can imagine it will be OK.

    K is a big adjustment for a lot of kiddos! Plus, if in your area preschool is expensive-- you are likely not the only one in the same situation.
  17. Chrissy Nelson

    Chrissy Nelson Well-Known Member

    I think preschool is just for the social aspect. Many of kids either go to preschool or not and I think either way they are sucessful :)
  18. Utopia122

    Utopia122 Well-Known Member

    My son didn't go. The only reason the girls were able to go is because of a grant that the elementary school had been awarded that allowed families to qualify because they raised the salary tier. My husband had lost his job and we still didn't qualify under the state financial requirements, but we qualified under the grant tier, so the girls were able to go for free. It was a blessing for us because we didn't know how we were going to afford daycare let alone preschool at that time.
  19. happychck

    happychck Well-Known Member

    i agree--totally don't sweat it! (and i teach preshool!). if your biggest concern is how they will react to a real school setting, i also wouldn't worry. my kids go to a lttle hippy preschool where it's free choice all day long. that is age appropriate! they don't need to learn to sit and take orders--shouldn't really have to do that in kinder, but def not in preschool. sounds like what you've been doing is way more stilmulating than many schools i've seen...... sit back and enjoy the next 6 months w/them! you'll miss it a ton when they're off to kinder:).

    btw, have you started looking at kinders? do you know where they are going to go? i'd concern myself w/that more now than anything else. just so you know what's in store.

    best of luck!

  20. ddancerd1

    ddancerd1 Well-Known Member

    thanks, all! the grade school is 2 blocks away from home - AWESOME! that's where they'll be going to kindergarten - 5th i believe (not that i want to be living here that long... i want to go back to chicago!!! )
  21. Specky

    Specky Well-Known Member

    When I asked this question to our pediatrician she said, 'there is no absolute need for preschool for many kids, don't stress, they just need to have the confidence to learn in kindergarten."

    That has put my mind at ease. Sounds like you are doing an amazing job giving your kids what they need.

    And another thought...if preschool or kindergarten for that matter were so crucial wouldn't it be mandatory? Welcome to the east coast!!
    1 person likes this.
  22. SuzyHolland

    SuzyHolland Well-Known Member

    Intresting to read,
    In Holland kids start school at 4. Elementry school is 8 years. The kids start after they turn 4. It is 5 days a week.
    The first year it's ok to skip a day.
    And the if you b-day is after jan, the kids start again in group 1 after summer vacation.

    All schools are free. There are different schools..catholic/public/montessori.....you are free to choose a school. there is no home scholing
    You pay for a school trip and a school-fund. together about $50,00 per kid a year
    My kids school, the kids stay at school for lunch, all kids bring their own lunch and a 10:00 snack/drink
    This is the new system. In the old system kids go home for lunch.
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