Do you spend time individually with your twin kids?

Discussion in 'General' started by Rollergiraffe, May 27, 2014.

  1. Rollergiraffe

    Rollergiraffe Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    I find this really challenging. I try to sneak moments here or there, but it's hard to do as life goes fast and furious. It's such a treat to spend time with them alone though. I love seeing them interact with each other too, but it's nice to not have interruptions and fights and all the things that come with siblings. Anyway, I just snuck Austin out of his prison daycare for lunch and we had a great time out in the sun. I am going to do that with Miles on Thursday. I don't know why I haven't done that before; their daycare is right next door to my office!
  2. MrsWright

    MrsWright Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    That's awesome! I wish mine was close so I could do that!:). I used to but everyone's schedules have gotten so busy I would have to send 2 to daycare on my days off:/. I do get a couple hours with Hannah when the boys were in preschool but I need to make more an effort
  3. megkc03

    megkc03 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Ya I find it super difficult to do so. :( Between soccer, Tball, dh and school/tax season, it was nearly impossible.

    If the chance arises, I'll take one to the store, but they rarely want to go lol. Last year I did take Nicholas mini golfing and to dinner and he still talks about it. I'd like to do it with all three on a more consistent basis but it's tough.

    I do have Annabella alone on Wednesdays for 2.5 hours while the boys are in K, but that's about it.
  4. Leighann

    Leighann Well-Known Member

    Not as much as I would like and its usually because one has a doctor's appointment.  How sad that the rare times I have one-on-one time with my kids is at the doctor!  I tried to implement one-on-one shopping with mommy time, but unlike Meaghan's kids, both the girls always want to come with me... and its food shopping so not all that exciting :) 
    We all do the best we can.
  5. miss_bossy18

    miss_bossy18 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    I find it's pretty difficult to do full "dates" one on one but I love when those small unexpected moments of alone time just appear during the day. I try to take advantage of them to just listen and be present before one of the siblings finds us. ;)
  6. cheezewhiz24

    cheezewhiz24 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Yes, but usually when I notice it's needed. It's hard for me to say that I'll can do it every week at a certain time. My boys really thrive on it and lately as one is sick and the other is well (and then reverse) they've been going to school by themselves and loving it.
    Like the others, Annabelle does get time with me alone when her brothers are in school.
  7. Rollergiraffe

    Rollergiraffe Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Yeah, Oz has been having some behavioural issues lately, and I thought it might help to double down on giving him the attention he keeps seeking. It's hard to squeeze it in though, and as crazy as taking 2 kids everywhere is, it's harder to schedule alone time with them. It's hard not to make the other one feel left out though. Anyway, maybe it will help, maybe it won't, but it's a treat either way.
  8. Nancy C

    Nancy C Well-Known Member

    It is super rare for us but I really try. Due to activities my older son and dd get some 1:1 time but twin son rarely, we had 3 hours this weekend just with him, he loved it! Makes me sad we can't do it each week.
  9. rayceryin12

    rayceryin12 Well-Known Member

    We try; like others, it doesn't happen as much as we want!
  10. eagleswings216

    eagleswings216 Well-Known Member

    I'm lucky to have a DH who is home most of the time in the evenings and weekends, so we do individual time pretty frequently.  DH's grandma is in assisted living, so DH alternates taking one of the boys there to see her.  Her room is tiny, and two of them in there is just overwhelming and they get rowdy too fast.  We also divide and conquer on errands, like if DH needs something at the hardware store, he'll take one, while I take the other to Target or wherever, or he will take one to do an errand while I stay home with the other and get them to help me with housework.  Honestly, we mostly started doing it as a survival strategy for when our boys are having trouble getting along, and we all liked it so well, we keep doing it on a regular basis now.
  11. kingeomer

    kingeomer Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Not much as I would like, but we do try to make the effort at least once month to do something one on one with the kids.  My daughter and I did Mommy and Me date day in February and my DH and son went to the auto show that day.  We have to set a date for me to have a day with my son and DH to have a daughter and daddy day.
  12. threebecamefive

    threebecamefive Well-Known Member

    We do and have since they were toddlers. It's a pretty big deal for all of us. We do special 1:1 dates, but we also do just errands or shopping with just one. We also have a big mommy/daughter date in the summer where we go somewhere for a couple days. My husband has a daddy/son date where they go backpacking in the mountains for a few days. I can't imagine (for us) not doing this with each of me three.

    The thing we don't do, but I wish we did, was dates with both of us and just one child. That seems extra difficult (and expensive!) as it would require us finding childcare for the other two while we are with one. Then again two more times.
  13. Ange2k25

    Ange2k25 Well-Known Member

    We try to, but it doesn't happen as often as it should. Tonight, Jessica had to finish homework so I took Katelyn outside and we deadheaded plants for about 20 minutes. It was nice to chat with her one on one and reminded me that we haven't had that kinda time for a while.
  14. kim01

    kim01 Well-Known Member

    I do every chance I get. It might be just one going to the dollar store with me, or the grocery store. Its important to me that they get some alone time with each of us. Hubby does good will shopping from time to time and the boys love to go to certain ones. So he ends up taking one with him when he goes. Were also doing a lot of house stuff right now. And each of them have things that they like to help with. So we hang out while doing x or y. We always have good convos.
  15. FGMH

    FGMH Well-Known Member

    On the weekends DH and I sometimes split up the kids and one of us will take one of them to go shopping or for a bike ride and the other will spend some time alone at home with the other one. Usually, I am the one to stay at home and it is fun even though we rarely do anything special - DS enjoys gardening or cooking with me, DD likes baking or playing board games and we usually have great conversations while doing so. We will see how that model plays out with our new baby.
    I try to schedule doctor's appointments in the morning so the other twin will be in pre-school and I can have a whole morning with one kid. I could take them out of pre-school more often for a morning alone with mom but it is a bit disruptive to everyone's routines and I think their teachers would be a lot less accepting if I did this without a good reason.
    I also get to spend afternoons alone with DS on and off because DD is very popular and gets lots of invitations to brithday parties while DS actually prefers an afternoon with mom.
  16. gina_leigh

    gina_leigh Well-Known Member

    Add me to the list that tries, but it's hard. Especially since Chris works a crazy schedule. Last night I wanted Rea to go to bed early. She's been fighting a virus for a few days and was so cranky. I knew she needed some extra sleep. To coax her into my plan, I promised her that I'd come snuggle in her bed until she went to sleep. Jason found out about our plan and then wanted his own snuggle time. So I stayed with Rea for about 20-30 minutes and then went to Jason's room. We chatted for most of the time and she wasn't asleep when I left, but I do think they both really needed that one-on-one time. I'm going to try and do that at least once a week when Chris is home. (He had the baby downstairs.)
    We try to split them up for errands, but either neither of them wants to go or they both want to go. Jason gets daddy time for haircuts. And he's getting just us time today because he chose to stay home from school on their last day today. (Rea couldn't imagine not going when I gave them the choice today! LOL) 
  17. Chrissy Nelson

    Chrissy Nelson Well-Known Member

    If I go to the store I always have 1 girl or the other go with me.  I use that time to catch up individually with the other.  They are 11 and I just think they need that time to talk.  Every since they were 5 we have been doing special dinners one will go with Devon one will go with me and we will swap.  It is just their special time individually.
  18. ECUBitzy

    ECUBitzy Well-Known Member

    Not too much lately, and I think we need it. :( Guilt!

    We spend all of our free time doing things as a family, so splitting up kind of pains me. I need to make it a priority, though, because I see signs that Samantha is happier and less... ornery when she has validation from Paul or I without any Alexis interruptions.
  19. southernmommy

    southernmommy Well-Known Member

    We don't do 1 on 1 dates or anything special but I do spend a lot of 1 on 1 time with each of my kids.
    I usually take 1 with me when I run to the store or do other errands. My oldest is 16 and after work he usually hangs out with me or DH for about 30 minutes talking about his day or the crazy people he had to deal with. When 3 of my girls were in dance the twins had class first so I hung out with my other DD for about an hour each week. On sports practice days I usually only take that kid with me and have some 1 on 1 time to and from practice.  My twins don't usually wake up until the other kids are in school and Megan is usually first up so I get to spend time with her in the morning.
    See nothing too fun but they all get their 1 on 1 time with me.
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