Expecting and Anxiety

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Help' started by mbentley1723, Jul 30, 2014.

  1. mbentley1723

    mbentley1723 New Member

    This is my very first pregnancy and I was overjoyed to find out that we would be welcoming our first and second child with the news of twins.  Before I even found out I was having twins, I worried about all the typical things like whether or not I would have a healthy baby.  But I feel things have become worse since the news arrived.  Having twins is a high risk pregnancy, and each one is just as unique as the any other pregnancy but my doctors seem to be preparing me for possibility of premature babies delivered by c-section.  In addition, since my children are sharing a placenta, they worry about the blood flow between them being distributed evenly.  I have tried reading up on it but there is no way to say which way it will go.  Not knowing is making me feel very anxious which is not good for my stress levels.  I want to be prepared but I also don't want to worry unnecessarily.  
    So, I guess what I am asking is, does anyone have any words of comfort or their own personal story to tell that would help me to understand what to expect? 
  2. kingeomer

    kingeomer Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    I struggled with major anxiety during my pregnancy.  Think of it this way, all multiple pregnancies are classified as high risk and high risk is just extra monitoring, it doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with you or the babies.  Believe me, my husband hated the words high risk every time he looked at our appointment card, he said it felt like they were "giving up on me and the babies"  (I don't know what gave him that idea, but that's what he thought).
    I stopped watching all the baby shows on TLC because, it just seemed like one problem after another and they just made me more anxious.
    Anxiety aside, I had a good pregnancy-no major problems, health issues or anything.  My daughter (baby A) was breech, so therefore I did have to have a c-section at 38 weeks. Babies were both healthy and no complications on their end.  Any complaints I had during the pregnancy were just normal pregnancy things.  
    My two were fraternal, they did not share a placenta so hopefully someone who has experience with that will chime in.
    I wish you all the best with your pregnancy :hug:
  3. lharrison1

    lharrison1 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Mine were also fraternal and didnt share a placenta, so I'm not sure of the extra risks that presents...but I do think its great that your doctor knows this and is keeping an eye on it.
    I do think twin pregnancies bring on extra stess both mentally and physically.  My pregnancy was pretty normal aside from the preterm labor at 30 weeks-I was put on bed rest and medication to stop contractions and delivered at just shy of 36 weeks.  No complications.
    What you are feeling is totally natural and please know that there are many of us here to support you through this.
    Welcome to TS and congratulations on expecting twins!!!
  4. miss_bossy18

    miss_bossy18 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    My girls were mono-di and I had a lot of anxiety at first but there were a couple of things I did that helped. For me, knowing the hard numbers is very important. Hearing that there's "an increased risk of X" is scary but hearing "the risk is 0.7%" is less so (just pulling numbers out of the air to make a point). When I found myself worrying about things over which I had no control, I would stop and choose to focus on the things I *was* doing (eating well, getting good prenatal care, listening to my body, etc). I would remind myself that I was doing everything I could to ensure that I and babies were healthy. There's nothing I could do beyond that. I also realized how quickly the anxiety could spread and expand. I started out by telling myself things like "Once I get to the end of the 1st trimester I won't have to worry anymore" "Once they're born I won't have to worry anymore" but I eventually realized that that was a bunch of hooey! There will ALWAYS be something to worry about and I knew I didn't want that to define my life or my parenting so I worked to actively release the worry whenever I felt it taking over. I hired a birth doula - she was an amazing support in a thousand ways but one of the biggest things for me was just having someone to call and express my fears, worries and concerns to without worrying about being judged. The emotional support through pregnancy alone was so worthwhile.

    All that being said, if the anxiety feels excessive or intrusive or you feel it's interfering with your day to day life regardless of anything you do to try and help, it may be worth talking to your doctor about. Women can have depression and anxiety related to pregnancy just as they can have postpartum anxiety and depression. :hug:
  5. rayceryin12

    rayceryin12 Well-Known Member

    Mine are mono-di as well. I was very nervous and anxious as well. I tried to make sure I always focused on the positive; that seemed to help!

    My boys were always no more than 5% apart in measurements and I had a planned c-section at 38 weeks 3 days. They are now sassy almost 2 year olds!

    Congrats and welcome!!
  6. astewart0610

    astewart0610 Well-Known Member

    Awe hang in there!! I remember when quite a few of us were due right around the same time. My boys are as well almost 2 now and were mono/di. I had them at 37+4 with an emergency unplanned section. I went into labor after a membrane stripping. They were my second pregnancy as I had a daughter just 18 months before them. I am 5'2 and weighed all of 108 lbs when I got pregnant. You can do it!!! I did not want a cesarean but it was necessary as I had a breech baby. It's not all that bad, and they joy you will feel once their born will make you forget the rest.
  7. EeeOoo

    EeeOoo Member

    My twins are mono/di.
    When I first found out that we're having twins, I cried.  I was alone, but sent a message to my husband and told him the news.  He was excited but I was bawling.  It wasn't because I didn't want twins, but the crying just came so naturally and suddenly, I couldn't control. I have anxiety and panic issues, so that probably set off the crying. However, I was thrilled and full of joy.
    And now at 30 weeks, I'm still trying to stay calm.  I've survived 7 months now, staying calm and not let things bother me.  However, I am starting to freak out a little about the delivery - csection vs. vaginal birth.  I am trying to gather as much information as possible about what to expect if I end up getting c/s.  And what to expect if I get induced labour.  I am hoping no complications and that the babies will be healthy.  And that's what causing a little panic in me.  
    My twins' heads are down right now.  So maybe no c/s, but I'm a natural worryer.  We still have quite a few weeks to go.  Baby A is very low, and I occasionally feel so much pressure in my pelvic area and my stomach feels so tight.  I hope they will stay in until at least 34 weeks.
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